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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/209759-Wraths-Tormented-Slave
by Aum
Rated: GC · Book · Personal · #524387
You don't like it, then don't read it. Simple as that.
#209759 added November 29, 2002 at 11:41pm
Restrictions: None
Wrath's Tormented Slave
This one entry will be a little bit of a rant. I'm sorry. I have to get this out of my system.

I'M TIRED OF RECEIVING HATE MAIL.

I may be leaving stories.com soon. I don't know. I want to wait another month to see how things turn out; but for the moment, I'm exhausted. I'm drained. I can't stand it anymore. I don't understand why some immature online teenagers lacking any sort of a personal life have chosen me as their scapegoat. I'm tired of finding messages in my inbox detailing to me exactly what type and class of fucked-up bitches I belong to. I'm TIRED. Can't you understand this, people? Is that really too much to ask, to be left alone?

I have a big mouth. I'll admit this right now. I'm brutally honest, and I'm also tactless. I like to provoke. I enjoy taunting. I have a hot temper, and get easily ticked off. Sometimes, the angry mails I receive are, to a limited extent, justified. But sometimes I get some which seems to be especially designed to anger or hurt me, because of who I am, because of what I said, because of in a world ruled by sheep and bigots I DARE to stand for myself, and that, well, that's unfair.

I've received plenty of angry comments since I've joined this site. Take note that I'm not a newcomer in the cyberworld; I've been part of several online communities before finding stories.com, and I've had plenty of occasions to learn the basics of online chatting and netiquette, to make friends, to read cyber stories, and so on. However, I've never, EVER received personal comments criticizing me, as a person, before arriving here. I'm not trying to blame the site or anything, but I think I may be the wrong type for it. I think I really don't sit well with some users here.

When I say hate mail, by the way, I mean comments designed especially to hurt or offend me, but comments that make some sort of a derogatory discriminative statement against my person; I don't mean harsh constructive criticism, friendly quarrels among cyber pals, or anything of the sort. I've received plenty of all types, and I appreciate the latter, although they can sting; but what I'm talking about is the most serious stuff, the stuff that's made to hurt, and not only to give me a good healthy shake (which I sometimes need.)

My latest example isn't the worse one, but, for some reason, it really set me off. Some guy (whom I imply to be of the bored teenage sort) once emailed me to ask a review for one of his works. This is something several users will sometimes do. They hear about me from some review forum, or read and enjoy my work, and decide they want to know my advice on some of their writings. While I prefer choosing my own reviews, I'm always pleased to help the people who mail me with requests, for as long as they aren't rude or insistent about it. I therefore read through this guy's story and gave him a detailed and honest review and rating (which was fairly low, although he didn't seem to mind.) Now this guy liked my review so much, that he began spamming me to have me read and review the entirety of his portfolio. He wanted my advice about everything. He also wanted me to advertise for him - basically, mention him to all of my online friends, plug for him in review forums, and so on. On one instance, he sent me seven copies of the same short message, in which he requested me to tell all my friends about his stories. I sent him a message telling him that sending a mail once was plenty enough, and that his requests were clogging my inbox and losing my time. I don't advertise for people, unless they've been really good friends to me (as the people mentioned in my signature have been.) I also don't read through people's entire portfolios, unless I really, really, REALLY enjoy their work, or unless I have an entire evening of wasted time ahead of me.

This guy didn't seem to get my message at all. He tried to get me to read his portfolio through flattery ("You're the best of the best!") although I don't recall him ever reading or reviewing any of my works. He told me I was "so nice" and asked me a few personal questions in order to "get friends," although he revealed nothing of himself. I was feeling manipulated. When he mailed to ask me to review the latest revised version of this particular story, I replied with a fairly long email, in which I basically told him that I only advertised for people who didn't just talk to me out of selfish interest, but who were willing to give something back as well. I mentioned a few users who have been outstandingly nice to me, among others, Sherye, Publius, Tommy, King's Advisor, and a couple others, and told him that I would do anything these people ever asked of me, because they'd been FRIENDS. I told him that I enjoyed being read and reviewed, too, and that if he expected more feedback from me, then he ought to give me some, too. I was VERY polite throughout this whole deal. I didn't swear, I didn't call him names, I didn't blame or insult him AT ALL. Now this guy just emailed me to tell me, in his usual two-liner message, that I was a rude bitch, and that he no longer wanted to have anything to do with me. I should be glad to be rid of him, and in a way, I am; but WHY, oh WHY does he have to be so mean about it? What did I ever do, but review his story, reply (very decently) to his mails, patiently skim through his pointless two-liners? I think I was patient with him. I think someone else might have been ruder; as a matter of fact, if I hadn't been in a good mood throughout this whole deal, I would have been ruder, too. I don't deserve to be called a rude bitch and cursed at, now, do I? Now I'm afraid he'll check out my portfolio and hate- rate and review it. I don't think I want that to happen right now. At this moment, I have a fairly low opinion of both myself and my writing, and I don't want any more hurtful criticism at all. I just want to curl up in a corner and die.

Maybe I just don't belong here... :(

Aw, someone. I need a hug.

- Aum


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Some beautiful, clever, or simply brilliant forums and groups. Please visit and encourage.

Publius' forum for no-strings-attached religious discussion.
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Tommy's support and encouragement forums. Too shy to post? Just be an angel!
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#519362 by Not Available.


Sherye's first ever contest. Check it out!
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#540765 by Not Available.


The Rebels of the Literary Arts - for the talented but woefully ignored authors.
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#356036 by Not Available.


(Aum is now a pro plugger)



** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Some beautiful, clever, or simply brilliant forums and groups. Please visit and encourage.

Publius' forum for no-strings-attached religious discussion.
 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#549863 by Not Available.


Tommy's support and encouragement forums. Too shy to post? Just be an angel!
 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#519351 by Not Available.

 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#519362 by Not Available.


Sherye's first ever contest. Check it out!
 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#540765 by Not Available.


The Rebels of the Literary Arts - for the talented but woefully ignored authors.
 Invalid Item 
This item number is not valid.
#356036 by Not Available.


(Aum is now a pro plugger)

© Copyright 2002 Aum (UN: lady_aum at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
Aum has granted Writing.Com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/209759-Wraths-Tormented-Slave