Life as we know it sucks

3 syllables is all it takes

Current Mood: feeling so wonderful

Current Music: Lost in the Translation - The June Spirit

I hate that he can do this to me. I hate that he can be a dick all the time and I can still possibly tolerate him. I don't think this has ever happened to me before. It's some crazy stuff. I may feel so pissed at him and it's like I can never see the light at the end of the tunnel, but then I just think about him, how much he means to me, how we absolutely connect. But, where is all this going? What's the point of carrying on if it's going no where? I think this is a good experience. Yes, I believe so. Jakey makes me feel so amazing and awful at the same time. That's what it's all about. This entire journey is about love. And this entire journey (so far) has been love. I don't think I'm making sense, so I'll move on.

Jacob sent me a file saying my name. Just 3 syllables. That is the most beautiful sound my ears have ever encountered. I love my name only when he says it. He - and he alone can satisfy me.

I know no one understands that he is the reason I get up in the morning. No one understands why that is. No one understands why I won't give Danny a chance. I guess no one will ever know. Doesn't matter to me. As long as I know and understand. Jakey also sent me two other things of him singing. Mmmmmmmm....I fell in love all over again. I was gushing with happiness. And giggling incessantly. It was just exhilarating. Completely.

I feel I condone too much of his characteristic flaws. His pot smoking habits, his hopelessness, his beliefs. And I'm wondering why I'm doing it. And if it's wrong? It really gets to me sometimes those things he does, but I just forget about them incredibly fast.

David:
Who knows how long I've loved you
You know I love you still
Will I wait a lonely lifetime
If you want me to - I will.