Life as we know it sucks

I'm sorry

Current Mood: relieved

Current Music: 46 and 2 - Tool


Dear Angelica,

         I have been meaning to write to you for months, but I put it off and put it off. Shows how much I care, huh? This is going to be the MOST honest note I have ever written. I want to be honest with you.
         I have been probably the worst, most horrible friend anyone could possibly have and I am sorry . . . but I know sorry's not good enough. I have just been so mean and so selfish. It's not that I don't care; it was just agitation. And, to be completely honest, you were agitating me. My mother yelled at me and all for being so mean, but I didn't really think I was being all that mean - was just blind and, once again, selfish.
         This whole agitation started when I started takling to Shane (yep, you guessed it.) I didn't feel like you cared at all, like you didn't want me happy because you weren't happy. That made me feel so stupid and so bad and I felt like you didn't care. Slowly, because of a stupid guy, we drifted apart.
         I knew it would be stupid to call this summer, but I should have anyway. I should stop being so stubborn. Once again, I am sorry.
         Since I came to school, I was feeling really lonely. I have missed you and I feel so bad about everything. I know you most likely hate me, but I wanted to give it a chance. I figured it was worth the try.
         EVERYONE, and I mean EVERYONE, was asking where you've been. I didn't even realize you hadn't been at school. I just figured we didn't have any classes and that the school was so big that I would never see you. It wasn't until the 3rd week of school that I heard you went to Highland. I couldn't believe that. That's when I started feeling guilty and even worse about everything that had happened between us over the months.
         I wish I'd never been such a bitch to you. Trust me, I was a bitch. I'm sure you thought that many times. It doesn't matter, because I admit it. I'm sorry. I'm such a bad friend. I just hope you'll forgive me.




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but i threw you the obvious,
just to see if there's more behind you.
eyes of a fallen angel,
eyes of a tragedy
but i see,
see through it all.
see through, see you