Shadow Puppet Storyteller

Unnerved

How do I pull this all together? I have several thoughts to express here, based on things that have hit me in the past few days. Are they related? Could be. Might just be hormonal. However, why should I second guess myself?

At Back to School Night, for example, the number of kids racing about with no direct supervision had me quite concerned. I had a few selective groups of kids I wanted to come down on with some authority for their behavior. I felt that a few times, but once I resisted that urge completely I felt overwhelmed and a bit scared. I had a very stong desire to flee the school yard. Is that a panic attack? Am I finally feeling my age when I'm thinking, "Kids these days..!"

Tonight I broke down and cried because I had 2 overdraft charges on a bank account. Money has been very tight and I realized the depth of my feelings. It's very personal. I do not like blaming other people. It is much harder blaming myself. But I've hit the wall - I know I can't just keep up appearances with how I handle my money.

I am not sliding into depression - so this third thought shouldn't alarm anyone - it's just a way of planning ahead (oh and yeah, take note, with money I DON'T HAVE - I'm good at that) I saw a news report a few weeks ago about creating a "LifeGem" from a loved one's ashes. Sounds like the best thing you can do with someone's ashes. So, I found their website. Let's hope for long life so I can make payments over time to become a sparkly!

Goofy, I know.