Too purty to live in town.....

10/12/07

Ok, Lets have a little fun. Just a little stress reliever......We all need a little stress-reliever! This only takes a minute.

DON'T LAUGH UNTIL YOU FIND OUT WHAT YOUR NEW NAME IS ..

Mine is Sloopy DippinFace

Follow the instructions to find your new name.

The following is excerpted from a children's book, Captain Underpants And the Perilous Plot Professor Poopypants, by Dave Pilkey, in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...
So:-
1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your New first name:

a = snickle
b = doombah
c = goober
d = cheesey
e = crusty
f = greasy
g = dumbo
h = farcus
i = dorky
j = doofus
k = funky
l = boobie
m = sleezy
n = sloopy
o = fluffy
p = stink y
q = slimy
r = dorfus
s = snooty
t = tootsie
u = dipsy
v = sneezy
w = liver
x = skippy
y = dink y
z = zippy

2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:

a = dippin
b = feather
c = batty
d = burger
e = chicken
f = barffy
g = lizard
h = waffle
i = farkle
j = monkey
k = flippin
l = fricken
m = bubble
n = rhino
o = potty
p = hamster
q = buckle
r = gizzard
s = lickin
t = sn ickle
u = chuckle
v = pickle
w = hubble
x = dingle
y = gorilla
z = girdle



3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:

a = butt
b = boob
c = face
d = nose
e = hump
f = breath
g = pan ts
h = shorts
i = lips
j = honker
k = head
l = tush
m = chunks
n = dunkin
o = brains
p = biscuits
q = toes
r = doodle
s = fanny
t = sniffer< BR>u = sprinkles
v = frack
w = squirt
x = humperdinck
y = hiney
z = juice

Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is: Fluffy Chucklefanny.

And remember that children laugh an average of 146 times a day; adults laugh an average of 4 times a day. Put more laughter in your day.

******************************
Dear Abby

My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the
beginning, and, when I confront him, he denies everything. What's
worse, everyone knows that he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also,
since he lost his job six years ago, he hasn't even looked for a new one. All
he does all day is smoke cigars, cruise around and B.S. with his buddies
while I have to work to pay the bills. Since our daughter went away
to college he doesn't even pretend to like me and hints that I may be a
lesbian. What should I do?

Signed: Clueless


Dear Clueless,

Grow up and dump him. Good grief, woman. You don't need him anymore!
You're a United States Senator from New York running for President of
the United States. Act like one!