The Undiscovered Country

Hybernation's End

PlannerDan talked about a loss of passion - the inability to complete any writing, including blog entries in "Invalid Entry" . I know exactly how he feels, having endured a similar loss of passion for the last six months or so.

I could use having a baby as an excuse, and it could be a valid one. Still, I missed not having the desire or energy to write. It's kept this woman's sanity held in one piece since her teens. It's as much a part of me as my right pinky toe.

It's normal, these hibernation periods, though that knowledge doesn't end the frustration. When the desire - or passion - kicks in once again, at least for me, the dry spell doesn't seem wasted surprisingly. In fact I feel rested, as though I returned from a relaxing vacation.

Writing can be a lot of work, so just like needing time away from our day job, we need time away from writing. In fact, I believe writing is more exhausting than anything else we do. It's one thing we place our very heart and soul on display for others to see. That takes a lot of energy, and not a little courage.

Two incidences have relit my passion:

1. Submitting my manuscript. It's one thing weighing on my mind for over five months, getting rid of it has released a burden. I now feel free to tackle other projects.

2. Diving once again into a Christian writer's Bible study called "Write His Answer" by Marlene Bagnull.

Last night I finished Lesson 14 entitled “Me – A Servant?” It discussed how to be a good servant, both in our everyday life as well as with our writing. At the end it asked to read the parables listed in Matthew 24:45-51 and Matthew 25:14-30, and to answer the question, “What is [Jesus] saying to you about your calling as a servant of the word?"

I won’t add what I came up with at the time (at 2am, I wasn’t as coherant as I am now). It occurred to me after I wrote down my thoughts, by not using the blessings, talents and gifts to God’s purpose, I am violating his trust.

Have I violated his trust with this lull in desire? No. As I said previous, these lulls can have a larger purpose. In my case, to concentrate on the baby. Thomas is another trust God has given me that I cannot violate, either.

I can do both. I want to do both.

Oh, I’m considering self-publishing my novella entitled “A Reason to Hope”. It’s in my port, but I made it private since I’ll be making many changes to it. Plus, if I do publish it, I’d rather you purchased a copy instead of reading it for free. Yes, I’m also in this for the money.

I know no traditional publisher will touch it because it’s a novella (25k words), and it’s Christian science fiction with homosexual characters. That fact is not the central theme, though. It’s actually based on Ecclesiastes; how life is pointless without God, and how God loves us and wants us as we are. The changes always come after we give our lives to him, not before.

But if you want to know more, you’ll have to read the book.

Once I publish it, that is.

Maybe. If I can afford it.

To help pay for publication, I’m selling most of my books both on eBay and Amazon. So far no luck, but it hasn’t been a week yet. As far as eBay goes, people usually don’t bid until it nears the end, because invariably someone outbids them.

If’n your interested in what I have so far (I have many, many more to add yet), check out the following links:

http://search.ebay.com/_W0QQsassZandram

http://www.amazon.com/gp/shops/index.html?ie=UTF8&sellerID=A2VT961WE758LH