The Undiscovered Country

Not Quite a Dear John Letter

I received a letter today. It was a thin letter, standard #10 envelope with my name and address typed nice and neat. Definitely done by computer.

And then I noted the return address.

I knew what the letter contained, and I admit to a twinge of fear. I hesitated to open it for a total of three minutes.

I inhaled deep and tore the letter open.

It read as follows:

Dear Andra,

Thank you for sending us your proposal for our review. While your project exhibits merit it is not quite what we are looking for at this time.

This is a good plotline but the writing craft is about a B (if we were to assign a letter grade to it). In other words, you have the start of something special, but it needs work to get to the level that will let you break into the market. The main problem is that it feels like the story is over narrated.

The immense number of proposals we receive, our full client list, and the intense nature of the competition in the marketplace causes us to be highly selective. Thus we have to make hard decisions.

We appreciate the opportunity and wish you the best in your search for another agency.

Far from the standard form rejection letter, I still could have plopped to the floor in a tantrum and screamed, "No fair, no fair! Waaaahaaahaaaahaaaa!"

But no, I thought it was a great letter. The agent took the time to not only read my proposal, but critique it.

I didn't know what he meant by "over narrated" though, so I said a little prayer: "God, I've taken this book as far as I can. It's yours to do with as you please. Whatever problems there be with it, show me how I can fix them."

Not two seconds later I got it and I wasn't even surprised. A lot of times the answers we seek for even the most confounding questions are ones we already know, but for whatever reason elude us for a time.

I know where the over narration is and had for quite some time - albeit on a subconscious level. After my prayer I realized the agent's letter confirmed what I suspected, but couldn't confirm. I now know how to fix it.

I'll tackle the editing later, though. I still have a novella to complete. That I know doesn't have an over narration problem. It has an under narration problem.

As I finish the novella, I will research into another agency.

On the lighter side:

Sunday we took Thomas on his first boat ride. Dave's cousin and his wife (Thomas' Godparents) invited us to breakfast on their pontoon boat as we putz along the Missouri River.

The weather started out perfect. At 7:30am, there were no other boats, the temperature was a comfortable 68 degrees, and with little wind, the water was smooth as glass.

We ended up staying until 3pm when I needed to get back to prepare for that night's Bible study. We all had a great time, and Thomas enjoyed having his feet in the water and watch the little waves tackle his legs. He only balked when he sat in it. Who could blame him, feeling the sudden cold water on his sensitive parts!

Got a few pictures to share of the trip:

Does this life jacket make me look fat? Mom won't answer.
She's too busy looking elsewhere. Plus my hat is crooked . . .



Daddy promised not to throw me overboard. AND he fixed my hat.



There's more than one use for a life jacket. It doubles as an umbrella.
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.