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Rated: 13+ · Book · Horror/Scary · #1521188
The horrors of being a single mother in a world of monsters.
#632413 added January 27, 2009 at 9:44pm
Restrictions: None
01: Chapter One
Chapter One

It was either the deafening clash of thunder or the bright blinding flash of lightning that pulled me from my nightmare. I wasn't sure which, but I was grateful. Long forgotten screams echoed in my head as I buried my face in my pillow to mask the sound of my sobs. The memory was already fading, but the terror remained. As did the phantom smell of dark basements and blood mixing with stagnant water that always stayed with me when I had that nightmare.

I rolled over in my king-sized bed, my hand reaching towards my husband's side. When all I encountered was an empty cold space, the tears welled up once more. I still forgot, even though it had been nearly a month. I still expected to feel Stefan sleeping next to me, ready to comfort me when I couldn't sleep or curl up beside me in the middle of the night. My husband was dead, murdered. His funeral had been a month ago and I only now felt like I was truly alone.

Since Stefan had been the Aid to the Ambassador of the Strigoi, the ruling body of the vampires, and was pushing for a more integrated way of living, the police thought that his death was politically motivated. My loving husband was a threat to his own people who wanted the Strigoi to remain hidden in shadows, to remain the creatures of myth even if it meant hiding from Hunters and fearing every day of their lives. He was a threat to the groups who wanted to bring the Hunters back, who thought that all the vampires were a threat and should be exterminated on sight. His latest project was to find a way to medically create blood plasma as an alternative to human donors and to get schools to offer a program to educate the children on the Strigoi gene so that they weren't feared.

“Education is our greatest weapon,” he was fond of saying. He worked so hard to keep his people from falling back in the dark ages, believing in the American dream of equality. He had marched for inhuman rights in the fifties and was rewarded for his hard work by being promoted to work for his people's Ambassador. He had a career in the Strigoi court, moving rapidly from the son of a Duke with no real title of his own to a hero and celebrity. There was talk of Stefan gaining his own territory by the next century.

“Mommy! Mommy!”

I sat up quickly, pushing the heavy curtain of my strawberry blond hair from my eyes. I waited a moment, listening to the storm rage outside my house. Was that my daughter calling me, or the ghosts of my past?

“Mommy!”

“I'm coming!” I slid off the bed and grabbed my robe. As I ran from my room and darted across the hall, I wiped my tears away. I did not want to upset my little girl. I had not let her see me cry since I found out that Stefan was dead. I had to be strong for her.

Throwing her door open, I was greeted by my ten-year-old daughter, crying in her bed. Her black hair, so much like her father's, was tangled and falling into her dark eyes. Like me, Cassandra suffered from nightmares, and it only got worse since Stefan died.

“What is it, sweetie? Did you have another nightmare?” I sad next to her and pulled her into my embrace. She was trembling and hiccuping.

“It's Daddy,” Cassy sobbed. “He's outside in the tree. He'll get wet if we don't let him in.”

“Oh, honey,” I whispered. “Daddy's in heaven. He's an angel with God and angels don't get wet.”

“No! He's outside. He wants to come in, but he can't. And the monster is out there, too! It wants in as well. We have to let Daddy in before the monster gets him!” She pointed to her window. I frowned when I realized that the blinds had been opened. I knew I had closed them when I had checked on her before going to bed. We lived in a community for the Strigoi, and I did not like the idea of anything nocturnal watching my baby while she slept.

The lightning flashed and my heart thudded against my chest. The shadows of the branches did look like something was crouched low, watching us. By the next flash, it looked as if it had moved. It could have been a trick of the light and my own fear, but I wasn't going to stick around to find out. I grabbed Cassy's hand and urged her from her bed.

“Come on, honey,” I said. “You'll stay with me tonight.”

“But, what about Daddy?”

I sucked in my breath to calm myself. “Whatever you think you saw, it wasn't Daddy. He's with God.”

“But Mommy -” Cassy whined.

“No buts. Trust me on this,” I said as I tucked her in on Stefan's side of the bed. I made a call to the neighborhood security and asked if they could take a look at the tree. I knew I'd sleep better knowing that there wasn't anything around the house. While I waited for their call back, I told Cassy my favorite stories from my Oma. They were all about Ysvelt and her prince, the Red Wolf. We were three stories in when the security guard called me back and said that they could find nothing.

“No evidence of anything in the tree,” I asked.

“No ma'am. Not even a paw print in your garden or a leaf out of place. Probably just the shadows.”

“You checked the old tree out front, right?”

“Yes ma'am. We took a walk all around the house to be sure.”

“Thank you,” I said. I smiled and turned to Cassy. “See, nothing in the tree.”

“Then why did you call the cops?”

I pulled the blankets a little tighter around her. “Just for our peace of mind. Would you have believed me just on my word alone?”

Sleepily, she said, “It's not like you could see Daddy or the monster. Adults never see anything.”

I sighed and curled up, holding her close to me. I fell asleep, only to have dreams of Stefan standing at the window, begging me to let him in.





“Time to wake up, Alastrina! It's a lovely day, the sun is shining and the birds are singing. You have a lot to do, so up!”

I groaned and snuggled deeper under the covers. I did not want to get up, I was comfortable and warm. There was nothing that I could think of that would move me from this spot.

“Alastrina, come on now! You have a full day and no time to sleep in!”

The covers were yanked off of me and I managed to glare at the man at the foot of my bed. Liam, bound Fae of the Quinn family, stood there in a light gray business suit with my covers clutched in his nut-brown hands. A real Irish Fae, one of the fairy folk, he was six feet tall and slender with large soulful brown eyes. For many generations, he served my father's family. Back when the Fae were declared to have legal human rights in the late fourteenth century, many took the extra precaution and willingly bound themselves as servants. They were now property of the family they entered with, and could not be hunted down. Liam stayed with me as a kind of personal assistant and nanny.

“You have to get up, Alastrina,” Liam said. He was one of the few people who used my full name. It sounded strange coming from him. He had long since lost his Irish accent, wanting to be as American as he could be. However, whenever he said my name, it was there. The only other time I had ever heard that Irish lilt in his voice was when he called me to tell me that the police had found Stefan's body. “You have work, naturally, and that important meeting with Zoran tonight.”

I grabbed the blankets and pulled them back over my body. Mumbling in my pillow, I said, “Give me a few more minutes. I didn't sleep well last night.”

“I don't care,” Liam said as he yanked the covers off again. “I said to get up! My God, Alastrina, you act like a child sometimes. Either you get up and get going or I'm dragging you to the showers.'

Reluctantly, I got out of bed. I was not a morning person before my first twelve cups of coffee. “You can call me Allie, you know. Alastrina is too formal.”

“I think not,” Liam sniffed. “I was the one who named you and I will use that name.” He dropped the blankets back on the bed and said, “Why is Cassandra here? Another nightmare? Did it have anything to do with the Rent-a-cops outside our home last night?”

I nodded and yawned as I went through my closet for something to wear. “She thought that Stefan and a monster were in the tree last night. She wanted me to save Stefan before the monster could get him.”

“Poor little girl. She takes so much after you. Probably blames herself for her father's death, just like you.”

“I have a good reason to blame myself for my parent's death. I introduced them to their killer. Cassy is innocent,” I said. “I could have handled this better. Instead of calling the security guards, I could have just turned off the alarm and opened the window. I didn't even think about it last night.”
“You did what you could. Cassandra has not been dealing with this well. I've caught her several times having tea parties with new imaginary friends. Normally, I wouldn't worry, but it's the names she gave some of them.”

“Oh, what names?” I knew that names meant a big deal to Liam. Names have power is what he always told me. He managed to win out on some bet and got the honor of naming me. He picked the name of his sister, a Fae who did not want to become bound and died during some witch hunt in a country whose name I couldn't even pronounce. That was one reason why he never called me Allie. It was to keep her memory alive.

“Annis is one of them,” Liam said, his voice trailing off. He sighed and shook his head. “Never mind. It's just something silly. I'm probably just on edge. That name means something.”

“I'll talk to her about it. She's ten, Liam, and just lost her father. It's hard, knowing that he's never coming back. I'm having problems dealing with it.” I pulled out my favorite white suit and held it up. “Okay, what shirt would be best with this? The red or the green?”

“The green, it matches your eyes,” Liam said. “Oh, before I forget, you got a call from Crystal with Century 21 yesterday. Something about a meeting and a new house?”

He sounded suspicious and I knew why. I hadn't informed him of my situation yet. To avoid the conversation, I quickly ducked into the bathroom and turned on the shower.

“Alastrina, what new house?” His voice was muffled by the noise and the door.

“We're moving,” I said over the water.

“Since when?”

“Since I can't stay here now that Stefan is dead,” I said as I pulled off my nightgown. “This home is property of the Court of the Strigoi. Without Stefan, I have no legal right to live here. I was given sixty days to find a new home. My time is running out.”

“What about Cassandra? Have you thought of her? Or me?”

I tested the water and got in. Shouting to be heard, I told him, “I have thought of her, but I don't have much of a choice. Besides, this could be the healthiest thing for her. A new place might help with these nightmares.”

“I meant, what if she has to change schools? It was hard enough for her to fit in at that exclusive Strigoi school you have her in, think of how hard it will be at a human school,” Liam said. “What if she has to go to a public school.” The horror was clearly evident in his voice.

“I went to public schools, and I turned out fine.”

“But, you're human! She's not!”

I sighed. I really hadn't thought of how hard it would be for Cassy. The vampires and 'thropes had only just gained their independence close to thirty years ago. The Court of the Strigoi had been the ruling government of the vampires, working in the shadows to keep the newly awakened vampires a secret. The movement in the fifties brought them to the light and granted them a semi-human status. In 1988, a scientist discovered that the Strigoi had a genetic defect. Stefan seized this information and launched a campaign, stating that the Strigoi had no choice but to be what they were, that it was just like being born with red hair or blue eyes.

“It's genetic,” he said. “We should not be discriminated against for a fluke of birth. Would you go out and legalize the slaughter of humans just because they were born with curly hair or brown eyes or born a boy or a girl? Why penalize us for our genetics? We can work around it and live in peace.”

Many people didn't feel safe when the President disbanded the Hunters and welcomed the Strigoi with open arms. There were rumors that he had a Strigoi lover on the side, but there was never any proof. Since then, the Strigoi and 'Thrope Alliance have worked with the government to create a peaceful and cooperative environment.

“She's a tough cookie,” I said. “She can make new friends. Think of this as an adventure. Besides, it can't be helped. After tonight, I won't be a lady in the Court. I'll be considered lower then a new vampire. I'll be human.”

“What about me?”

“I'm looking into some Fae-friendly homes. Crystal is an expert in that. However, my price range is further south, like Stafford or Fredericksburg. Do you think you can move that far south? You can always live with Evan if it'll be a problem.”

“I can manage,” Liam said. “The Lord and Lady isn't the only Fae-run clothing store in Virginia. If I have to find a new job, I can.”

I smiled as I ducked my head under the spray of water to wash my hair. Most bound Fae did not work outside the home. Any jobs held by Fae were either done by the Free Fae, but they were a dying breed. Many Free Fae were killed as superstitions that they would rise up and destroy humans started to circulate in the early sixteenth century. A few survivors fled to other parts of the world, but some of them, like Liam's sister, were slaughtered as part of superstitions and blame in those country targeted the Fae as a solution to various problems. After all, who better to blame a drought on then the sparkling tall stranger?

Only recently did the families that took in Fae servants allowed them to work outside the home. After moving in with me and Stefan, Liam approached me about taking a part-time job at the Lord and Lady. I signed the statement that he had my permission to work.

Turning off the shower, I grabbed my towel before poking my head out the door. “Liam, wake up Cassy and get her dressed.”

Liam nodded and turned to get Cassy while I closed the door to change. I took a moment to look at my body and sighed. I no longer had the perky breasts or model perfect body of my college days. I still had stretch marks from Cassy's birth and a slightly flabby stomach. Those, plus the scars I collected over the years made me feel less than desirable. I never noticed my flaws when Stefan was alive. Indeed, he loved me despite my many markings.

“Still, not bad for a gal of thirty-three,” I said as I got dressed. I was towel drying my hair when I walked out to check on Cassy. Liam was having just as a hard time getting her up as he did me. Like mother like daughter. I stood back and watched with a smile on my face.

“Cassandra, come on. You have to get dressed. You're going to be staying with the Helmers today.”

“Don't wanna,” Cassy argued from behind Stefan's pillow. “I wanna stay home with you!”

“You have to go. I have work today, so does your mom. You're too young to stay home alone.”

“I'm ten! I'm old enough!”

“Cassy, don't argue,” I said. “Come on, let's get you dressed and we'll get breakfast.”

“No! I wanna stay home!”

“Oh, too bad,” I said. “I was thinking about having pancakes.”

“I wanna stay home! I don't like the Helmers.”

“Not even if we get pancakes with chocolate chips?”

She peered up from Stefan's pillow. “Lots of chocolate chips?”

“All the chocolate chips you want.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

Cassy smiled and jumped off the bed. As she scampered from the room, Liam glared at me. “Pancakes? With chocolate chips? And just who do you think is going to cook this wonderful breakfast? Not me, I can tell you that. I have too much to do already.”

“IHOP. We'll have time.”

“Only if you hurry up. I'll dress her and you finish getting ready,” Liam said, waving his hands at me. “Hurry!”

I smiled and walked back to the bathroom. I quickly brushed the tangles out of my long locks of hair. Not for the first time in my life I thought about cutting my hair. Not that I ever would, the guilt would kill me. My Oma had long hair, as did my mother. It was one of the few gypsy traditions we still followed. I would have to have Liam braid it tonight. For now, I merely bound it in a fat ponytail with a bright green and yellow scarf.

Walking over to Cassy's room, I smiled when I saw that my daughter and Liam had continued their battle of wills. Cassy wanted to wear the dress Stefan had gotten her for last Christmas. It was far too warm for the ungodly hot August weather, but Cassy didn't seem to care. She twirled in the heavy velvet dress, giggling as the skirt wrapped around her legs.

“You can't wear that,” Liam said. From the tone of his voice, he had been saying that a lot. “It's a hundred degrees outside! You'll melt into a puddle before you get in the car.”

“I'm a princess,” Cassy said. “I want to wear this dress.”

“You can't wear that, Cassandra,” Liam said.

“Cassy, honey, that dress is for winter. It's still summer,” I reasoned.

“But Daddy gave it to me! I want to wear it!”

I sighed. I loved her, and I knew she missed her father, but her grief came in stages. We had gone through the 'Daddy's not really gone' stage that led to her trying to open the casket during Stefan's funeral mass, her anger at being left behind, and now her belief that Stefan was in the tree outside and wanting to wear anything that he gave her when he was alive. I noticed she also had stolen the good jewelry that Stefan had given her from my jewelry box.

“Cassandra, please put on this summer dress instead,” Liam pleaded.

“No!”

“Cassy, honey, please put on the summer dress,” I said. “Daddy wouldn't want you to get heat stroke, now would he?”

She looked down and I felt guilty for using Stefan like that. “No,” she whispered. “Daddy wouldn't want that.”

A bit more subdued, she allowed Liam to help her change her clothes. He gave me a reproachful look as he left.

“Here, let me do your hair,” I said. I took out a bright sash that went with her dress. I pulled her hair back in a ponytail like mine, tying the sash in a bow.

“There, sweetie. You look like me, and you know Daddy loved my hair like this.”

Cassy nodded, looking a little happier. She tugged on a lock of her hair and looked at me with my much longer hair.

“Mommy, why don't you ever cut your hair, but I have to cut mine?”

I thought this over for a moment. I still lived by the rules that my Oma had taught me. Silly rules that were adapted from the old ways. Most of what Oma had taught me was just her way of holding on to the past. Stefan had thought my ways were quaint and charming, and it was how I kept my family alive in my heart.

“We can grow your hair out as long as mine,” I said. “It's just, all the women of my family have had long hair and your father wanted you to have a more manageable hairstyle.” Not that her hair was short. It only went to just past her shoulders whereas mine flowed down to just past my rear end.

I took the jewelry from her and told her to finish grabbing the things she was bringing to the Helmers' home. I past Liam in the hallway, his glare was still disapproving.

“I know it was wrong,” I said. “I panicked.”

“We'll talk of this later, Alastrina.” And like that, I was a little girl again. Liam may not be my father, but he had long since perfected the disappointed fatherly sigh and a frown that made me want to cry. Before I could say anything, he ran down the stairs to get himself ready for his day, leaving me with a knot in my stomach.

The housing development that we lived in was built only for the families of the Court of Strigoi. My neighbors were all the lower ranking lords and ladies and barons. The higher ranking nobility, such as the Earls and the Dukes all had private mansions on rolling green lands and an army of security. Stefan could have lived there, being the son of a Duke, but he wanted to stay closer to his people. In the past few months, the exclusively Strigoi neighborhood had opened its gates to the ever budding 'Thrope Alliance, the organization that was to shapeshifters what the Court was for vampires. I was glad that we were going to be forced to move. I did not want to share my neighborhood with the likes of wererats or werewolves. Those animals were not welcomed.

After a quick breakfast at IHOP, I dropped Cassy off with her babysitter. She complained that she was too old for a sitter, and I told her that maybe next year she could stay home alone. As I left her there, I thought back at what Liam had said about finding her a school. School was one month away, which I hoped was plenty of time to find a new home. However, at the moment, Cassy went to a private school for the children of the Strigoi. There, she was not vampire enough, despite her title of Young Duchess. In a private school, would she be human enough?
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