Can we talk?

My Dad and Food

    My father is in his 80's and has been sick lately. He's still going pretty strong, still works at least 30 hours a week, drives where he wants, gardens, shops, does his own laundry, etc. But he's been under the weather, and won't eat, and sleeps a lot when he's not working. He even left work a few minutes early a few days.

    I've thought about how important food has been in his life. When he was 12, his mother lied about his age and put him to work in a grocery store. He carried the boxes of food for blocks to the patrons' autos, maybe for a small tip. It set his career. He's always worked in grocery, wholesale or retail, and specifically in meat. The last 15 years in organic, or since his first attempt at retirement.

      Although he was raised in the city, every summer of his childhood he spent with relatives in the country. He learned to hunt, fish, separate cream from the milk, operate a team of mules and a cart, and make apple butter. He ate only what was homegrown or homemade. His aunts and his mother were all great cooks. My mom was even better, but she didn't have to use a wood stove.

        While weekdays, cottage cheese and fruit make a good lunch, or soup, or a salad, and Sunday leftovers for night, those Sunday and holiday meals had to be a feast. And it got bigger for guests. It still does, even though Mom isn't here to do the cooking. His ideal feast would start with cantaloupe slices and chunks of sweet watermelon, locally grown when possible. Cucumbers and tomatoes are a must. A salad must include greens, radishes, raw cauliflower, carrots and a choice of dressings. And cottage cheese. He really likes cottage cheese.

      Vegetables include what's readily available and easily grown. Summer squash and zucchini are staples at our house. I mix them with onion and a little tarragon to keep from adding cheese which we don't need. He would eat corn on the cob 52 weeks a year, I think. Whenever I say I'm sick of corn on the cob, people tell me I'm crazy, but they don't have to cook it every week. Cabbage and turnips are frequently on our table. I have one brother who hates turnips and gets upset when the potatoes are mixed in, so I always cook the potatoes separately for him.

      When not doing cabbage and potatoes he likes potato salad, the kind with a lot of vegetables and mustard. You mix it while the potatoes are still hot, so they get a little mushy. My mom made good potato salad and got lots of compliments on it. I always thought it was a little heavy on pickles and onions, but otherwise good. Dad's version is very heavy on pickles, onions, and celery. He will doctor up store bought potato salad this way, and no one eats it but him. He just can't get enough vegetables!

    For holiday feasts, he likes seafood salad. I know the menu is full already, but he adds this. White fish, real crab meat, mayo, and --you guessed it-- celery and onions. And sometimes green pepper! Of course, seafood seasoning. He makes it himself. Mine is too bland for him.

    When it comes to green beans, he doesn't like my leaner version. "I like my beans greasy." So I'm resigned to some fat meat, more lean than fat, in the beans. (I've given up baking fish because he prefers it fried.) He prefers his greens heavily seasoned, country style. Sometimes, we have beets, any style.

    And he has to have bread. Biscuits, rolls, corn bread, it doesn't matter. Loaf bread if all else fails. I like to make spoon bread, which passes. No one can measure up to my mom's rolls, so I don't try, except the frozen variety.

      He can live without gravies or mashed potatoes or baked potatoes. Sometimes he settles for beans and cornbread. But soup days, he throws every thing in but the kitchen sink. It never turns out the same way twice. I can't follow a recipe if he's at home. But these aren't feast days.

    Dessert really doesn't matter, as long as there's something, a cookie, Jello, whatever. He does like banana pudding. Speaking of which, he has half a banana every morning with his oatmeal.
   
    Meat was just something you tacked on. It really wasn't needed.

    The bottom line is he's always had simple tastes, nothing fancy or exotic. He grew up lower working class, but there was always plenty to eat, the chickens in the backyard, the vegetables in the garden, or the apples from the orchard at his mother's homeplace. His table was always open to strangers and friends alike. He's always been generous. He's had variety, and wanted everyone to have their fill. If you ate too much, it was your own fault. If you made wrong choices, that's your fault, too. He offered healthy, wholesome natural foods. He has worked hard to provide and enjoy good things.