Jaded Warriors book 2 (Jade Series)

Chapter 12

Chapter 12


         I woke once again, surrounded by the tranquil calm of Gage's arms holding me close. I stirred slightly, not completely wanting to fully wake up for fear he was a dream. A faint smile grew on my cheeks and warmed my insides as I felt his heated breath move past his lips and whisper in my ear.


         “Good morning… What are you smiling about?”


         My smile grew and I felt my cheeks flush. “You.”


         “How did you sleep?”


         “Good… I went through the whole night without a nightmare,” I said groggily, as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes. 


         “I think that's a first since you've been here.”


         “How do you know that?”


         The warmth in his eyes turned somber. “I can hear you.”


         “You can hear me from all the way back in your room?”


         “I haven't slept in there since you've been here. I sleep right there,” he said, as he pointed through the doorway to the sofa. He gave me an apologetic glance. I had no idea, I'd always closed the door, shut myself off from everyone, everything. I didn't think about what went on outside of my bedroom when I closed off.


         “Why?”


         “If Damian tries to come through that front door, I'll be ready… I'll rip his damn head off,” he fumed, I startled and jumped back slightly at the iciness of his eyes and his quickly roused anger, then glanced at me again with a regretful stare. He sighed deeply as he released his grip on me and let his head fall back against the pillow as he fixed his eyes on the textured, white ceiling. His eyes drifted closed. “I'm sorry. My anger isn't what you need to see right now. I didn't mean to scare you. The last thing I want is to make you afraid of me.”


         “I'm not afraid of you, Gage,” I spoke softly, as I leaned over him, placing a gentle hand on his whisker-roughened cheek to turn him to look at me. A wistful smile passed through my eyes as I consciously rubbed his two-day stubble. “I don't know why I jumped. It's just a reaction, more than anything. I trust you, more than I trust anyone and to hear you say that you sleep outside my room makes me feel safe, thank you.”


         “Good,” he said, as relief swept over his eyes. A hint of sarcasm lit in his eyes as a crooked smile grew at the corner of his lip. “So, then I guess you won't mind when I say that I also listen to you talk in your sleep.”


         My jaw dropped with embarrassment as my cheeks flooded red at the remnant memory of last night drifted into my mind. “What did I say last night?” I asked, curious as I remembered us by the fire and hearing his chuckle as I drifted off to sleep.


         “I can't tell you.”


         “Why?”


         “I'm afraid that's between your subconscious and me.”


***


The snow crunched underfoot as I walked outside. The crisp air bit at my cheeks as I pulled my coat closer around me. The sun, high in the blue sky looked deceptively warm and did little to warm me as it glistened bright against the undisturbed snow. I sank past my ankles as I went in search of Gage, and found him in the barn feeding the horses.


“I thought this was going to be my job?”


“It will be, once I leave… but I can do it until then,” he said, as he looked up with a forced smile as his jaw tensed, a suggestion of bleakness and discouragement in his eyes. With the pitch fork in hand he raked the last of the loose hay neatly into a pile then scooped it up and placed it in the trough. Tiny confetti like flakes of hay, flurried weightless through the air and settled back onto the earthen floor of the barn.


“When do you expect Kane back?”


“Any day I guess,” he said, as he stopped and stared at me, the pitchfork still in hand supporting his weight as he rested his forearm on the handle.


“Are you leaving with him?” I already knew the answer to my question and couldn't hide the uneasiness in my voice. I knew he felt it too. Each day that passed, we seemed to become more comfortable together but disquiet grew, unspoken between us, which caused a new heaviness in my heart. I knew Gage would have to leave soon.


“Yeah,” he said, his voice equally apprehensive, matched the fear I felt. He placed the pitchfork against the stall and walked outside to the side of the barn with nothing more said, and then pulled off his coat, exposing his bare, muscled arms. They flexed as he picked up the axe and set a log upright. He eyed it with scrupulous calm but his hands seemed restless as he swung it swiftly over his head and then buried it in the log, splitting it in two.


“What are you doing?” I asked as I scanned over the already neatly stacked, four-foot high pile that stretched the length of the barn.


“Chopping wood,” he said, with a perplexed look in his eyes. It was more than obvious what he was doing, but I couldn't help but feel like he used it to escape for some reason.


“I know, I mean, why? It looks like we have plenty.”


“I want to make sure you have enough firewood while I'm gone,” he said, as he placed another log upright.


“It looks like there's enough to last until next fall,” I said, perplexed, as I studied the stack, then glanced at him suddenly. I could almost see the wheels churning as he sorted words in his mind, words that didn't come. He swung at the next log as he averted my stare as I came to realize, he had no idea how long he'd be gone. His silence told me it would be longer than either of us could deal with right now. 


“Is there anything particular that you want to eat before you’re gone?” I asked, then instantly cursed myself with silent reprimand as I thought about how my question sounded. He gave me a questioning glance, as if I just asked what his choice was for his last meal before he met his fate. I wrung my hands together with nervous exasperation. “I just thought… I could make something for you.”


A crooked smile curled at the corner of his lip as my heart pounded with fierce awkwardness, I continued to make things worse for myself. He chuckled under his breath as he saw my dread and set the axe against the barn as he moved closer to me.


“I'm coming back, Jade.”


“I know,” I hesitated, as my chest tightened. With my uncertainty difficult to mask, I took a step back and busied myself with straightening the stack of wood. I plucked a few from the pile as I glanced over my shoulder to see his soft blue eyes, intent on watching me. “I just needed some wood for the kitchen,” I said, as I turned to go back inside.


“Hey,” he said, as he reached for my arm and stopped me. “Everything will be fine, okay.”


“Okay…” I said, as I suddenly felt my chin tremble. He blurred before me. My eyes burned as I turned away. The cool air pulled the moisture from them and I walked away before he could stop me.


I blinked back tears and took a deep breath to calm myself as I neared the house. The snow crunched under foot as I walked across the back yard. I turned the corner then stopped suddenly in my tracks.


“Oh!”


A large man, burly in stature, walked up the side of the house towards me.  With acute curiosity, his dark eyes met mine then scanned over me, as if taking a mental note. His weathered face was familiar, even under the full mountain man beard, which took the place of his scruff he sported the last time I saw him at my kitchen table. His eyes were the same, cold and calloused, that seeped with distrust and suspicious interrogation for anyone who crossed his path. 


A second man, smaller and clean-shaven, with wire-framed glasses that rested low on his nose, walked next to him and they both stopped in front of me as the smaller man held out his hand.


“I'm Grant Hill and this is Darby Johnston, you must be, Jade.”


“Yeah,” I hesitated as I glanced down at his outstretched hand, unable to counter due to the bundle of wood I carried in my arms. I offered the tips of my fingers and he shook them, almost pulling the stack of wood from my arms.


“You are looking better than I expected,” Darby said as he stepped forward and looked over me with an approving glance. “From what Kane has told me, you were-”


“Can I help you with something?” I interrupted.


“Actually, you can,” he paused, “your brother seems to think you can't get by without him and we need him. I was hoping you could be a little more convincing that you can survive without your personal secret service. I think you can understand, more than most maybe… why we need him back in the game.”


“My brother has done more than most to supply this war and continues to do so… This is hardly a game and he's risked his life just like the rest of you.”


“I'm glad to see you finally understand the seriousness of what's going on here… but, because of his concern for you… your brother is falling short and-”


“What do you want, Darby?” Gage asked, with a tone that was less than welcoming. I glanced back quickly over my shoulder, relieved to see him as he walked up behind me. My heart quickened as Darby stalked forward with apish agility, close enough to pin me between him and Gage. His eyes dark and calculating under furrowed brows. 


“We need to talk.”


“Later,” Gage said, as he curled an arm around me and pulled me behind him then took the bundle of firewood from my hands and set it next to the garage. He looked at me with sternness in his eyes. “Go inside, Jade…”


“No, now…” Darby recoiled.


“About what?” Gage whirled around with postured intolerance at Darby's inappropriate manners and stood inches from him. I pressed myself into the cold brick of the wall as I watched the heated exchange escalate rather quickly. His shoulders squared with his fists pumped and ready. “You're wearing out your welcome rather fast.”


“Whoa… easy, Gage,” Darby smirked, “we're on the same side here. I was just letting Jade know… how much in demand her brother is… we need you both back if she can get by without you. ”


“We may fight on the same side, but my loyalty to you ends there… your visit here is pointless and over, now leave,” Gage said dryly, his rebuke thickened in the brooding silence as Darby stared, satisfyingly unfazed, as if the remark stroked his ego.


“I'm not going anywhere until I get your word that you'll be back by Monday… I have a feeling, you might try to change your mind.”


“I don't answer to you!”


“Actually, you do. I'm in command here now and you will be answering to me.”


“Like I told you before, I already had this conversation with Prescott. When I decide its safe enough for her, I'll be back.”


“Prescott radioed in and asked us to come and request your presence,” Grant said, as he interrupted the exchange between them. “Darby is in command.”


“Why?” Gage demanded, with questioning sharpness in his eyes. His jaw tensed with his bristled temper, fueled by the outlandish idea that Prescott put Darby in command. 


“Just following orders,” Darby said, with a pervasively evil look about him, and then continued with bearish rudeness. “Be careful with your actions, Gage. You're on thin ice with me, I'm liable to question your loyalty to this campaign... you wouldn't want to be arrested for treason.”


My eyebrows raised with disbelief as my heart stilled in my chest with painful constricting spasms at the thought of Gage arrested. He stood, apparently unaffected by Darby's uncompromising threats.


“Where's Prescott and Mike Thornton?” Gage asked, his voice low and even as he restrained his anger.


“Morrison has blocked all travel east. The help we're waiting for from Washington can't get through, Prescott and Thornton are stuck in the middle of Militia territory,” Grant said, wide eyed and tight lipped with urgency in his voice that provoked Gage to laugh.


“Everywhere east of the Mississippi is Militia territory! We've been in the middle of it, since this whole thing started! Nothing has changed…What do you want?”


“We need everyone who is out on pass to return, everyone, including you. There will be no passes allowed until further notice. Those orders come from Prescott himself.”


“And if I don't?”


“I really don't think you want to go there,” Darby paused briefly, his antagonistic views developed into a buzzing silence as the tension between the two thickened. “You know Kane's contact. We need the trade to happen now, instead of three weeks from now, and we were hoping you would make the run since Kane isn't back yet.”


“I can't do that… You know he only works with Kane.”


“You've gone with him before.”


“Yeah, with Kane… What about Joel, he established the contact with him.”


“Joel is barely holding the front line… Morrison has put the pressure on and we can't spare him… You're already out.”


“If Kane's not back by tomorrow… I'll go.”


I watched satisfaction leak into Darby's dark eyes as he settled his shoulders. He took two steps back. I shifted uncomfortably under his intimidating glare, then with a smirk he winked. Goose bumps crawled over my skin. “Looks like I'll be seeing you tomorrow.”


Gage watched through his steely glare until they disappeared around to the front of the house. His brows knit together at the bridge of his nose, his eyes, still icy as he looked over his shoulder. They softened instantly as he saw me standing against the wall and walked over to me.


“Are you okay?”


“Yeah.”


“I thought you were going in,” he asked, a questioning look settled in his eyes. I couldn't respond. I heard far more information than Gage probably wanted me to hear and I wasn't exactly happy to hear it myself, but I couldn't bring myself to leave.  Gage heaved the bundle of wood into one arm, then pushed open the door and waited for me to walk in. “Let's go inside.”


***


I busied myself as I stuck a roast in the oven and cleaned up the kitchen. Deep in thought, I worried about the uncertainty of what lie ahead. Gage had tried to reassure me earlier that he would return as soon as he could, but I couldn't get past the idea, that he only spoke half-truths. He had no idea when he would return. Darby's visit fueled my worries and I knew the chances that Gage may be hurt or killed hovered over me like a dark raincloud and dampened my mood to the point I felt sick.


“Hey,” Gage said, from somewhere behind me and I twisted around to see him propped up against the doorframe. My heart skipped. 


“Hey,” I replied back. A sense of melancholy hovered between us.


“Come here,” he instructed, and watched me as I walked over to him. I stood before him, trembling inside, my jitteriness spurred by dreaded anticipation as time passed too quickly and I wished it would freeze like the outside air. Soon enough, he would have to leave, too soon, before all between us could mend.


He reached for my hand and gently drew me to him. His palms pressed into the small of my back and pulled me close as I surrendered against my brooding panic and rested my head against his chest. I closed my eyes as I felt his heavy sigh and reached my arms under his around him as he squeezed me tight.


I tilted my head back and looked into his soft blue eyes, brimming with feeling that he verbally restrained because of me. I returned my cheek to his chest and closed my eyes as I felt his chest rise and fall with each breath.


“Would you want to walk over to Deanna's with me?”


“Yeah.”


“We don't have to stay long… I just want to see Ivy before I go.”


“Sure,” I paused, as a smile grew on my cheeks, “we can stay as long as you want.”


His arms tightened around me as I started to pull away. I glanced at him, puzzled then giggled at his whimsical smile. “Did you want to go now? Or… did you want to wait until later?”


“Hmm, on second thought,” he paused, as he contemplated his choices then looked at me with tenderness in his eyes. “Just let me have this for a moment longer.”


“What?”


“You… in my arms,” he said. His voice, raspy and low in his chest, sent a sudden chill through me and stole my breath as his gaze drew me in. I gasped when his hand softly grabbed mine and placed it on his chest over his heart and held it in place. The beat of his heart, hard and fast against the palm of my hand spurred mine as it quickened in my chest. His hand left mine, my skin tingled from the absence of his touch, then his fingers traced slowly up my neck and cupped my cheek before his fingers tangled in my hair, decreasing the air between us. His lips inched closer to mine.


“Gage…” I hesitated, my body tense. My breath stilled inside me as my heart galloped inside my chest.


“Shh,” he whispered, “breathe, beautiful.”


Submerged in the same silence, inches apart, I heard nothing but the steady sounds of his breaths, hot and minty against my lips as they hovered over mine. In repetitive motion, his thumb brushed slowly across my bottom lip, touching me, letting me feel him touch me, as the surge of panic waned.


“You're shaking,” he whispered, his voice husky, “are you okay?”


“Yeah,” I breathed a ragged breath, and then a nervous laugh escaped me as I lost myself in his cobalt eyes.


“Do you trust me?”


“Yeah…”


“Close your eyes.”


I let my eyes drift closed as he continued to feather my lips with his thumbs. His musky scent, mingled with freshly chopped pine, intensified and I felt my knees tremble while his velvety soft lips pressed gently on my forehead. A tingling rush surged through me as I became dizzy and my world spun around me. My chest caved with each breath as my eyes burst open to see a yearning deep in his soul, which hemmed me in further. I gripped his muscled arms in nervous anticipation as he leaned in closer, his lips inches from me as his eyes searched mine for any sign of restraint and I longed to feel his lips again.


Suddenly, cold air rushed in as the back door flew open. I whirled around to see Kane stumble inside as he stomped snow from his boots onto the mat. He glanced up completely unaware of his intrusion then he smiled with mischievous accusation and a quick shift of his eyebrows.


“Sorry, should I have knocked first?”


I backed up into Gage and felt the rumble in his chest as he chuckled. Heated embarrassment flooded my cheeks, as I stood unable to respond.


“You know what?” Kane paused, and with a smirk across his cheeks, he scrupulously retraced his steps backwards as if stepping through a minefield and opened the door. “Forget I was even here… I'm just going to go back outside… and I'll be back in about five minutes. Hopefully, you can either wrap this up or move to another room, because I'm hungry and you're standing in my way of the fridge.”


Gage laughed aloud and my jaw dropped, then without thinking, I spun around and bolted out of the kitchen.


“Nice one, Kane,” Gage scoffed, from somewhere behind me and I heard his footsteps close in as he followed me and I hastily walked through the front room. “Jade, wait.” 


My heart fluttered inside with remnant feelings of his touch moments ago as a smile lit across my face. I stopped in the center of the rug and turned quickly to face him. He crashed into me, apparently not expecting me to respond so quickly. With his forward momentum, my twisted feet entwined with his and I clutched onto him as he grabbed me. I squealed as I felt backwards onto the floor, pulling him with me with a loud thud that echoed through the vaulted ceilings.


“Everything okay?” I heard Kane holler from the kitchen, and then laughed from the doorway when he found us.


“Get lost!” Gage yelled. He gave him a harsh look and Kane ducked away.  He looked back at me, sandwiched between him and the floor. Our bodies tangled as he propped himself on his elbows at either side of my cheeks with worry in his deep blue eyes.


The weight of his body, perfectly contoured with mine sent a shocking sense of security through me. The after effects, a tingling rush to every nerve ending as parts of my body crushed intimately against his, which warmed my insides and stole my breath.


“Breathe,” he whispered softly.


“Sorry,” I said as I exhaled, my cheeks flooded with embarrassment as I made a failed attempt to hide my smile. A giggle escaped me and I covered my face with my hands as he chuckled, and then he pulled them away.


“Don't be,” he said. A crooked grin curled at his lips as his eyes sparked with laughter. “That was too much fun to be sorry.”   


Gage rolled to his back and curled me into his arm as he stared up at the ceiling with an amusing expression on his face and took a deep breath. He gave me a sideways glance, his eyes still brimming.


“When did he get home?” I asked, as I tried to hide the annoyance in my voice at my brother's impeccable timing.


“I guess just now,” he said, equally annoyed.


“Should we go to Deanna's?” I asked, my voice soft. I moistened my lips, on fire with a tingling down to my belly from his almost kiss. He watched with a hint of torment in his eyes. He sighed.


“Yeah, let's go.”