Wondering about my Wanderings

If It Is YOU LORD!!

September 22, 2013
This is one of those days that I just barely wrestled myself out of bed. I have been going through a difficult time at work. The environment is not healthy in a spiritual, emotional or physical sense. I am faced with continuing to wake up, going to work and coming home. Much of the time I am fearful that I might lose my job. The bottom line is that I have to pay the bills and I need health insurance for various medical issues.

God was speaking to me in that rassling match. After I felt awake I made it to church. The message that I took from the sermon is the title of this blog. I like Peter, was wanting to walk on water for all the wrong reasons. He begs the question to anyone listening; "If it is YOU LORD call me to walk on the water. I can hear myself saying this as I stumble out the door to work. This blog is as much a prayer as an entry. I pray that I might be patient and wait for Jesus without a need to prove to myself or God that I have faith/am good enough.

I am reminded of another place that these words are implied if not said directly. The sisters of Lazurus were waiting for Jesus and when he got there they told him that it was too late. Jesus told them to remove the stone and all the people could think of was the stink of the dead body. Lazurus hears Jesus voice and comes forth. I await this voice and at the same time am not sure I am up to the task. Jesus will be there anyway. There is something better when I put down the sword that begs an answer, If It Is YOU LORD. Jesus will come. Even as Jesus died on the cross he heard these same words. Jesus chooses to die for us and come to us in a forgiving moment which is what I need more than anything right now!! Even so Come Lord I await your presence.