Can We Talk 2

Sad Encounter

         You never know when you're going to end up in a big emotional mess. Today I had to process some returns and cancel a layaway for a woman whose child was stillborn. She had finished the nursery, but didn't need the things now. She was trying not to cry unsuccessfully. I tried to suck it up and be tough. It probably looked like I didn't care, but I was trying to keep from losing it in public. Crying is contagious.

         It turns out the child was not hers. I thought maybe she'd be the grandmother and the sad child at home was her daughter. The sad child was an adopted daughter, the half-sister of the stillborn child. The mother was an unrelated drug addict. The adopted child was a slow learner, about two years behind as is typical of a drug or alcohol dependent baby. This child was grieving for the baby sister who "went to live with Jesus" before she got to meet her. She wanted her baby sister at home.

         The crying woman I was dealing with had two kids of her own in college. She doesn't want to encourage this drug user to keep getting pregnant, but social services called and asked if she would take the child when it was born. She and her husband said yes. Now they are heart broken.

         It seems so unfair, that horrible people keep having children. People who really want them and love them and would be good parents get turned down. Some times it seems there is a correlation between stupidity and shallow character with fertility. Responsible, loving, intelligent people struggle trying to have a child or adopt one.

         These encounters with other people's troubles make you appreciate life a little more. You want to hold on close to the people that matter. Their sorrow impacts us and drains us. The hope is that somehow we are more compassionate, that maybe we are more appreciative of those who have opened their hearts and their homes to needy children. What a burden they bear. How big their hearts are!