Everyday Canvas

Acceptance versus Ambition

Prompt: Do you think being grateful for what we have and accepting things as they are can be in conflict with ambition and working toward making things better?

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I don’t think accepting things as they are and being grateful for what we have has to be in conflict with ambition. One can be happy with the status quo and can still work toward success. What is wrong here can be when people are pushed by others or by themselves internally. Our education system is partially responsible for such a conflict if there is any.

School counselors, coaches, and other staff always tell the kids, “You have great potential.” I think, while this may help the children to try harder toward success, it also may make them feel guilty and bad about themselves later in life when they don’t become first-rate something.

This presence of great potential is what my kids were told and I was told. None of us fulfilled that supposition. None of us became a world-wide famous anything. Worse yet, one of my kids just stopped trying at one time. It took a lot of work on everyone’s part to get him going again. I think the negative behavior we see in a world-class athlete or a highly successful expert in any area is the result of this pushing by internal or external high expectations. At some point when the athlete or the student does something really negative, this behavior seems to me to be a rebellion of sorts against such expectations whether success happened or not.

Maybe all that hard-driving of our kids should be replaced with their self-acceptance, our acceptance of them, and everyone’s just being happy with the status quo while encouraging all students to finish the tasks at hand.

It is a given that most anyone wants to succeed and to make things better, no matter the current situation. It is just human nature, but also, we have to be content with who we are and what we have accomplished so far and accept that there are some things and situations in life that cannot be changed. Things happen to people that may prevent them from living up to their own and everyone else’s expectations, no matter what their potential can be. After all, happiness does not depend on the ranking of success but on our ability to deal with its absence or presence.