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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/942034-Sign
Rated: 18+ · Book · Personal · #1196512
Not for the faint of art.
#942034 added September 26, 2018 at 2:21am
Restrictions: None
Sign
You know those credit/debit card readers they have at cash registers?

Some models have an attached stylus that the customer is supposed to use to sign the pad to authorize the transaction. You're supposed to use the stylus because any other object, say an ink pen, fucks up the screen. Hell, pressing too hard with the stylus can fuck up the screen.

One local store apparently had enough of idiots who can't/won't follow simple fucking instructions or be arsed to give a shit about anything, and removed all the styluses. Styli. Styla. Goddammit, I don't remember Latin.

So in order to confuse the humans even more, they put little handwritten signs above the pads. Originally, these signs read:

Please sign with finger pen is broken

Now, I'll give them a pass on the punctuation thing. Ideally, a semicolon after "finger." I'd be okay with a period, too. At least they didn't use a comma splice. But the lack of punctuation is important for the point I'm trying to make.

See, on each of these readers, the handwritten sign has been torn so that "broken" no longer exists. (So I'm guessing it was "broken." Maybe it was "missing." Or possibly "stolen." Doesn't matter.) This leaves us with:

Please sign with finger pen is

Which wouldn't be so bad if they'd maybe used a bigger space between the last two words.

© Copyright 2018 Robert Waltz (UN: cathartes02 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/942034-Sign