These Are My JOTtings, Part #2

Where Are You, Christmas?

Maybe this is just what happens when you start to getting along in years,
but the minutes,
hours,
days,
weeks,
months,
and years
are starting to spin for me.

Maybe it was because my ability to move quickly
was, actually faster when I was in my twenties,
but I find it so difficult to keep pace these days
with everything, that needs to be done.

The Christmas Season is no different.
With the years spinning by
at breakneck speed,
I find, that I enjoy the last half of the year,
even more than the first.

Maybe that's why I'm starting to tear up tonight.
With Christmas less than one week away,
I'm having to "brace for impact"
because the world is about "to throw out Christmas, like a hamburger wrapper."

Pragmatically, that's all that Christmas is for the stores.
"Make the sales!"
Black Friday means that the stores are finally able
to turn a profit after recouping all the investment capital
for operating costs, products, and taxes for the year.
I have no doubt, that that is the very reason why Christmas sales
are pushed so early in the year.
We find Christmas items in stores as early as August
for the general merchandise corporations,
and as early as June in the hobby/craft-related stores.

It's a great marriage for me.
I'm a big fan of Hobby Lobby.
That's why I enjoy June through December.
I can enjoy Christmas for a long time in this store.

However, in recent years it has been more difficult to shop there
during the week before Christmas,
since the spring product is already in that store,
making my brain and heart go, "TILT!"

Tonight I watched, again, the Jim Carrey version of
How The Grinch Stole Christmas.
In this movie one song always makes me tear up and cry.

"Where Are You, Christmas?" sung by Cindy Lou Who,
brings back the memory of when I first realized,
that Santa Claus was not real in the sense of everything
we attribute to his ability to bring gifts
to all of the children of the world in one night.

There is something significant about the breaking of the childlike heart.
No more hopes.
No more belief in something beyond oneself.
No more imagination.
No more Joy.
No more wonder.

Maybe it's just me, but we seem to spend the rest of our lives
seeking to rekindle the wonder in the heart of that little child,
that lives inside of each one of us.

"But Jesus said,
'Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them;
for of such is the kingdom of heaven.'” (Matthew 19:14, NKJV)

This is the very reason why I talk about Jesus so much.
Since He created me, He's the only One, Who truly knows
the depths of my little child's heart,
encouraging me to come to Him
in that way small children come to loving parents...with abandon.

The years, that followed my discovery about Santa Claus
made the afternoon of Christmas the saddest time of the year for me.
The Christmas Story had been read.
The presents had been given, opened, and become "old hat," just that quickly.
The Christmas decorations had been enjoyed, and soon they would be put away, again.

There is a spirit of kindness, joy, and peace,
that seems to be prevalent during the Christmas season,
that is rarer throughout the rest of the year.
The lack thereof creates a sadness, that is palpable.

In recent years I have come to realize,
that the very One, Who came at Christmas time
is with me throughout the year in a very real way,
that I cannot fully express.
I need His nearness.
I need the Joy of knowing, that He came to Earth because He loves me.
I need to be reminded every day, that His Birth is the start of Everlasting Hope.

Therefore, though I must "soldier on" throughout the year, alone,
"Keeping Christmas in my heart" as quoth Scrooge,
this soldier can get alone with His Lord
in the enjoyment of the Christmas carols,
in hopping up into His lap like a little child,
in thanking Him for everything, that He had to endure, during His Earthly sojourn,
in looking at the twinkling lights in my craft area to remind me,
that He is the Light of the world.

"He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High
shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

"I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust." (Psalm 91:1-2, KJV)

These verses are a warm hug to me.
Jesus wraps me in His arms. That's where I want to stay.

Where are you, Christmas? Right in the arms of Jesus.

What's next? Secret Christmas on Resurrection Sunday morning "when the greatest gift of Christmas is opened," never to be covered, again.

Let me finish this tome of a free verse
with the video version of this song, that I love the best.

by Jay O'Toole
on December 20th, 2019