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 |  Am I supposed to write? |
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** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Documenting the trials and tribulations of sharing my writing. I know it will be a grand adventure. I'm sure I'll get a sore butt from the bumps along the way, but they are just part of the ride. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| Writing is an art. This is my opinion and I’m entitled to it and you can’t convince me otherwise. An academic paper or submission to a certain body/organization might have to follow a specific format. Everything else is free form and that is art. The best thing about art is it is subjective. One should always feel strong enough to flip-off one’s critics. Until now, I have never read anything Stephen King penned. No offense to Mr. King but the scary / horror genre is not my choice of reading materials. Unfortunately, the better it’s written, the more likely I am to have nightmares. I wish I could control it, but I can’t, so I don’t sweat it nor do I buy books by Stephen King, until now. I’m half way through:
I’m fairly sure the next half won’t disappoint. It is not purely his memoirs nor is it a how-to book. A perspective would be the best way to describe it; King’s philosophy on how he got to where he is today. “Write a lot and read a lot.” Simple and sound advice. While reading and writing, develop a style; write to your strengths and write what you know. He confesses pet peeves and admits writing is not all about good language. He laughs at two of his novels being rejected and later accepted, once he was ”Stephen King”. You can’t help but feel his love of writing, crawling out of the pages. At the end of the book, he includes a list of books he has read and ENJOYED over the past five years. What a variety!! Mr. King, thank-you for reminding me of my potential and all the crazy reasons for loving this challenge we call writing. |
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| For the longest time, I’ve had the dream of owning my own, shall we say… gathering place. I blame this on give credit for this to Mrs. Rogan. She owned a bookstore for young people, Rogan’s Books. She had the first store in an old house sandwiched between a Woolworth’s and an A&P. In those days , it was safe to leave your young child, unattended, under the supervision of a stranger. My mom was not alone in taking advantage of the location of the bookstore. While Mrs. Rogan’s good nature was abused by some, most of us regular readers wanted to be there. Children with no sincere interest in being there, often never returned. Mrs. Rogan’s genuine attempts to find them something to read, scared the abandoned children away. I’m sure they promised their mothers they would be angels as long as they didn’t have to go to the Crazy Book Lady’s house again. My sister was one of those kids. I loved it there! I couldn’t spend enough time there and Mrs. Rogan always welcomed me. She would have books set aside for me; things she was sure I would like. It was Mrs. Rogan who introduced me to both Beverly Cleary and Judy Blume. I would read from the time my mom dropped me off until however late I could convince my mom to let me stay. I eventually figured out the store was not the only place I could read. So many worlds opened when I figured out I could bring home as many books as I my parents could afford. The Chronicles of Narnia books were the first I remember buying with my own money. I still have them, in good condition, today. The prices are marked on the inside cover. The first I purchased for seventy-five cents. The most expensive of the series was $1.15. From Narnia, I moved to the Canadian east coast and the Anne of Green Gables series by L.M. Montgomery. Oops… * * Practice focus and concentration. Remain on topic. ** Mrs. Rogan and her bookstore were in my life for a large part of my childhood. Some would even call that time of my life the formative years. Until she closed the store, the summer before I turned seventeen, I visited her faithfully, once a week. Our relationship lasted twelve years, her impact on me, a lifetime. When she retired, I told myself that one day, I’d open a place where great minds could come together and talk about books, exchange ideas and solve the problems of the world. Over time, the blueprint for my sanctuary has changed. What has stayed constant is the incredible collection of books available and it’s safe environment in which to partake in intelligent conversations. At different times in my life, this place has been a coffee bar, a fully stocked bar, a wine bar, a beer bar and a juice bar. I’ve pictured live, acoustic guitar music, classical music on CDs and of course, the sounds of silence. Chairs and couches are my favourite furniture choice but I did have a bean bag motif happening for some time. I also had a no furniture idea, thinking standing would encourage more mingling and therefore more conversation. My plans have now morphed into the concept of an artist’s commune. Did I mention I’m establishing this community on one of the Hawaiian Islands? Good, year-round weather there. If pressed, I’m sure I could think of some other positive arguments for living in Hawaii.  The closing of ANOTHER independent bookstore triggered these thoughts. I’m saddened because it was a great place to have a cup of coffee and visit with friends. The owner hosted book clubs on a few different nights and was active in the neighbourhood. It was more than a bookstore, it was a gathering place in the community. Curse him and his debts. What about my needs? |
| I refuse to let Procrastination force me to wait until the last minute to blog. I also have some things I want to share. Thus, today’s entry is easier to write than most. Drumroll please….. A big old Go Girl!! goes to SouthernDiva   . If you don’t know why, you must pop over to:
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** And bugzy is baaaccck!! this is for you… ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Use it to draw new lines. Crayon isn’t easy to erase. Use it wisely and don’t box yourself in.When The Literary Penguin becomes rich and famous, I’m going to be able to brag that I knew him way back when. I think he must be a bit crazy though, he considers me amongst his friends. Look what he gave me:![Merit Badge in Friendship
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Thank you for sticking by me for the last year. Here's hoping that 2008 is even better than 2007.
Geraint](https://images.Writing.Com/imgs/writing.com/writers/badges/general-Friendship-650.gif) As a real friend, I must make it easy for people to find his blog. I must give credit where credit is due. I’m getting the images from:
or
Everyone should check them out some time.  Today has been a particularly pissy day. Nothing I can do to change it so I’m getting over it and moving on. This is where my list of affirmations comes in. I choose to practice gratitude and be ever so grateful for the positive things in my life rather than let the idiots of the world monopolize any more of my time. Needless to say I was continually practicing patience and trying not to judge others all day. I love being perfect. |
| After reminding myself, I must blog, I must blog, I must blog, several times this morning, I put an elastic on my wrist and told myself to snap it every time I thought about blogging but didn’t. After snapping the elastic sixteen times, I removed the annoying rubber band but still didn’t blog. I’m not sure if I’m lazy or unmotivated. I know I want to blog. For a rational being that should be enough to prompt action. It’s not. I know I need to practice sharing things I write, (Yes, I believe blogging is writing.) yet I let the perfect opportunity to expose my words to world pass by. If there’s a safer place, than the WDC blogs, to share one’s writing, I don’t know about it. Procrastination and myself have been friends for some time. I think I met the little devil around the same time I met his pal Deadline. My problem is Deadline isn’t always around and I can’t get rid of Procrastination without him. I don’t like to be rushed when I’m preparing for the arrival of Deadline but I’m easily distracted and inevitably, Procrastination arrives and wreaks havoc. Despite my objections, Procrastination lingers, often until moments before Deadline arrives. Seriously, if you ever ask me to do something, GIVE ME A DEADLINE. If it ain’t on my list and don’t have no deadline, it don’t get done. The task will disappear to the land of good intentions. I decided I was going to commit to blogging daily and the little WDC blog calendar was a great accountability tool. I could have instant gratification watching the dates turn blue, one by one. This theory worked for a few days but that damn Procrastination keeps showing up around noon. I’ve chased him away a couple of days but today he wouldn’t budge. Good thing I can rely on Deadline. There’s no stopping his arrival. As the clock ticks away and I smile at my triumph over my old friend, I plot a plan to foil any of his attempts to distract me tomorrow. I only have to fight him off until Habit arrives and takes over the show. She makes sure things get done without me having to think about it. There’s nothing worse than having to think. |
| I freewrite everyday. I have for as long as I can remember. Some kids liked to colour, I liked to print words. In high school, others doodled; I composed articles for The Globe & Mail . I find freewriting satisfying, even when I rewrite only my name, over and over again. As much as I love this practice, I have NEVER written in the morning. I don’t do much in the morning. I’m not a fan. I know this about myself yet I attempted to blog this morning. An overall frustrating experience and crappy start to the day. All you Morning People can’t say I didn’t give it a try. And by the way, what drug are you on? How do you spring out of bed, wear a smile on your face and act happy? You NEVER want to be the person that has to wake me up. It won’t be a pleasant experience. I talk to NOBODY before two cups of coffee. In the words of Garfield, one of my favourite fuzzy friends, “I don’t do mornings.”. Knowing this, I still tried to blog. Who will ever understand why I did that to myself? Needless to say, the attempt was not successful. I did manage to spill one cup of coffee and stubbed my two twice. The aforementioned stubbing, lead to an outburst of profanities. When the spill had been mopped and my mouth washed out with soap, I still lacked inspiration for blog. Here it is, a bit over 12 hours later and my muse continues to elude me. Despite the thousand of fabulous blog topics which crossed my mind throughout the day, I stare at a blank screen. I choose to think my morning attempt jinxed my blog efforts for the day. This is my story and I’m sticking to it. |
| I tend to disappoint myself when it comes to witty banter. Don’t get me wrong, I’m more than capable of intelligent conversation. What I lack is the perfectly timed humour of the great orators; the ability to deliver a zinger and shut down a heckler. These are the talents of the great speakers, hence, I made the choice to be a writer. Writing allows a delay of thought prior to its introduction to the world. This is to my advantage. I like my thoughts to percolate for some time before I share them. I’m the person who comes up with the perfect retort… four hours after the original insult. Nobody has ever accused me of rushing for or through anything. I enjoy the flexibility of writing. When the perfect word comes to me an hour later, I find it therapeutic to scribble the new over the old. Characters tremble with excitement when they go from hero to villain with a couple clicks of the keyboard. The power of the red pen or DEL button is mind numbing. A casual hello can easily become a magnificent first impression. But it happens over time. I envy the talents of Jim Carrey, Robin Williams, Jon Stewart and Rick Mercer. They see humour, or at the very least a unique slant, in everyday occurrences. They genuinely live to make people laugh and they do so spontaneously. Disappointment fills their souls when they aren’t heckled. It must suck to be them when they have a bad day. Humour is rarely funny when people have to work at it. Following this logic, I can explain why my life is so much funnier than my writing. Being funny is about poorly timed mishaps, mistakes and embarrassing moments. Writing funny is so much trickier. Thinking becomes a bad thing. I examine each and every word prior to commitment . When I’m ready to make a decision, the funny is nowhere to be found. It has been beaten down by good grammar, proper punctuation and dictionary dictated spelling. That’s a whole lotta work for very little laugh, if any. Given enough time and paper, I can find funny. It is usually dry humour or something related to a pun. Sometimes my nonsense becomes funny; not because the writing is brilliant but because the picture I paint is so surreal. The power of the pen gives me many attempts at finding funny, even when I miss it the first 84 . I continue to practice my oral humour while around close friends and they laugh. I’m never sure if they are snickering at what I said or at my pursuit of humour. I’m not sure it matters, as long as the laughing continues |
| At midnight, I say farewell to 2007. The magnificent events and trying times become memories filed away with the rest of my previous life. The year was not good nor was it bad, it just was. Some wonderful things, out of my control, brought joy to my days. The fates were sometimes cruel and hung a black cloud over my head. The things I could not control, shall not be judged. They will be remembered for what they were, very small moments in my very large life. I don’t care for resolutions. So many people make them, yet so few take them seriously. The idea of New Year Resolutions bothers me even more. We should all know change is possible at any time. Waiting for January 1 is an excuse to postpone doing something we’re not sure we are strong enough to accomplish. I do believe in affirmations. Some may mock Nada and her Lists of 5. I, myself, am a fan. I have hundreds of lists. Mine tend to be in groups of 3 or 7. I don’t like even numbered lists. I don’t know why so please don’t ask. Perhaps I’m inherently odd? The answer to this is it’s own blog entry. I did have a point when I started this….Yes, I remember, my anti-resolutions. At the beginning of each month, I write a list of seven things I want to incorporate into my daily life. It’s on the first of each month in my datebook. Yes, I do have a PDA but I remember things better when I write them down. Besides, I can’t paper clip notes and business cards and receipts to a Palm Pilot. Ah, pen & paper versus technology, another blog entry. And, I digress again… I’m writing my list for January 2008. Since so many are sharing their resolutions, I thought I’d share my affirmations. 1. Don’t judge, unless summoned for jury duty. 2. Practice gratitude. I have a great life. 3. Laugh loudly and as often as possible. 4. Practice patience. It can’t be helped the rest of the world is not as perfect as I. 5. Focus and concentrate on the task at hand. I don’t need anymore unfinished projects piling up around the house. 6. Say hello to more strangers. They are only strange until I get to know them and I’m sure most people won’t bite. 7. Don’t sweat the stuff I can’t control. These change each month, often reflecting what has been happening in my life or what impending doom I see in the next 30 days. I keep my list simple and to the point. I try to rewrite them every day so short and sweet is best. To those of you writing your resolutions, I wish you luck in meeting your goals. To those of you smart enough to avoid the trappings of such a list, I raise a glass in honour. Change when you are good and ready not when someone tells you it’s time. To all of you, I wish love and laughter and the strength to beat down the obstacles you may find in your path. May 2008 bring you more than what you deserve and be full of surprises. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Sig gifted and created by rain |
| I enjoyed chatting with a young friend of mine today. There is a significant age difference, my tattoo is older than she, but for the most part we have intelligent conversations about a rainbow of topics. Sometimes I laugh at her but usually she’s laughing at me. While visiting with her today, I finally realized what is meant by a “generation gap”. GENERATION GAP: The inability of the older and wiser individual to convince their younger counterpart they don’t know everything, coupled with the inherent resistance of youth to believe anybody might have possibly survived the same experience. I am not laughing at my friend, I am venting my frustration and not being able to communicate my message. I remember what it was like to be 20… I wouldn’t listen to me either. It is a fact of life that some lessons must be learned by living. There is no substitute for experience. Those of you who are parents understand exactly what I mean. You want to prevent your child from making the same mistakes you did. It’s hard to accept this is not possible. They will make their own mistakes and they will get hurt. This cannot be stopped. As counselors or confidants, it’s our job to stand by them and watch them fall on their asses. It’s our responsibility to help them up and help them heal. Most importantly, it is our duty to perfectly time our delivery of I told you so. We don’t want to brag but we do want credit. My mother tells me things I know I won’t understand for another decade or so. They sound absurd now but life has shown me that as I age, my mother gets smarter. Every so often I hear her, telling my dad, “Now I know what my mother meant when she said…. It sort of pisses me off to know my mom will be telling me I told you so for the rest of her life. She’s not the most gracious winner.  |
| I'm a believer in accountability. Intention and motivation may start the engine, but accountability gets things done. Some individuals have the strength and discipline to be accountable to themselves. You know the type. They spring out of bed, determine what they need to do and don't rest until all items on their list have been completed. I applaud their energy, even though they get on my nerves. I do not have this type of drive. I need to know a reward awaits me and I am not referring to material things. A smile or increasing the value of my word are often fine prizes for a job well done. I do my best not to disappoint others but don't make the same effort to not disappoint myself. * wonders what Freud would think * In an attempt to get things done today, I'm going to share my To Do list with you. If I do this I might be more motivated to get things done. I will want to brag I got everything accomplished rather than rationalize my lazy habits. LAUNDRY - Come tomorrow I will only have pajamas to wear. While they may be comfy, they tell the world I'd rather be curled up on my couch or in my bed. This is a secret I'd rather keep to myself. DUST - Writing words of inspiration across dusty surfaces does not constitute home decor. DISHES - I like to get them washed before they begin to smell. CLIENT FILES - Because I work out of the house, I tend t think there is always time to do work later. Of course, I tend to wait until the last minute and rush through things. I'm determined not to have to work while I watch football on Sunday!! I only need to close two files. ERRANDS - While I have been willing to go without a few things around the house, I will not survive without toilet paper. Basic needs demand a trip to the grocery store. There they are, my goals for the day. I think writing them down makes them real. And I'll be embarassed to admit I couldn't get these few things done in an 8 hour day. Spending all day on WdC is not an excuse not to do chores, although it is a whole bunch more fun. |
 LOOK UP!! bugzy is baaaccck!! ROCKS! She insisted the place be spruced up a bit. One helluva woman, that Bugzy. And she can write too. If you were to poll the local crowd, I feel confident more folks would have me on their naughty list than on their Christmas card list. You'd think I had been an awfully good girl this past year, if you were to judge by the goodies in my WdC mailbox. I thank-you all. I want to write more and had planned to write more but it's gone. All day I had brilliant ideas, fabulous blog topics, living in my brain. Now, when it counts, the thoughts abandoned me. I'm left to ramble on about nothing. It's all right to move on to the next blog now. I'll try again tomorrow. |
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