Long, Long, Long

I'm glad I found this contest before the closing date Here's my entry:

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One day they love us because we're unique. The next we're in jail because we're different.

For generations we've used the oracular reading of oxen guts to predict our students' careers, or lack thereof.
Ew. Couldn't you use some sort of aptitude test instead?
We tried that. The oxen guts were more accurate by 72%.

Zlang-Zlang Squid Says: On the road of life, when you stop to smell roses, do not sniff the bees!