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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/3352336
Review #3352336
Viewing a review of:
Take Your Son to Work  [E]
A Bank Robber takes his son to work with him. My first attempt at dialogue
by BIG BAD WOLF is hopping
Review by Yellow Rose
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
** Image ID #1598825 Unavailable **



DISCLAIMER: This comes to you as a reader would see your work. I have only my opinion to offer.


TITLE: Fits the content well.

IMAGERY: Good and vivid. This is a cute piece. A man taking his son to work. A robber is going about robbing a place and his kid wants ice cream. The cop that responds to the robbery has his son too. Both kids want ice cream. So on the way the two men decide ice cream is what is needed to shut the kids up so they can do the business at hand.

TONE: Good depth of feelings. The exchange between characters is very natural and real. Children want what they want no matter what's going on.




FLOW: Flow is good. The word choice is good

OVERALL: Good read. Good job with this. Please keep sharing.

Yellow
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 07/21/2010 @ 4:43pm EDT
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/3352336