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Review #3825644
Viewing a review of:
The Wayward Cataphiles  [13+]
Journey Through Genres Contest Entry (November 2012). Fantasy Genre.
by Jeff
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Dear SoCalScribe,

A very happy 10th Anniversary to you, I hope you've enjoyed a wonderful day so far! Here is my review for your piece. *Smile*

This was a delight to read! I loved how you deceived the reader into thinking this would be a particular type of story: a dangerous romance set in Paris, where a naive young man is willingly seduced by a daring Parisian beauty. I enjoyed how you portrayed Astrid - she was always going to be bad news - yet, without spoiling the ending, the final reveal was literally something out of this world that I didn't see coming. Very well played!

I felt as though most of your focus in writing this piece centred around Astrid. As such, her character was well defined, and mysterious enough to hold the reader's interest. I think perhaps I might have liked a more interesting, in-depth look at Stephen, as I feel I hardly got to know him as a person. I couldn't see what separated him from the cliche male victim that so often tragically falls for one-sided relationships. Once we entered Marcel's place, the pacing of your story picked up nicely, however, perhaps with a more character-driven initiation, the opening may turn out even stronger. Nevertheless, this is simply my individual perception.

This is a fast-paced, assertive story, and I think you found a wonderful balance between exposition, description and action! You truly dealt with these aspects flawlessly, and it allowed me to become immersed at full leisure. You describe the settings of your piece fleetingly, yet memorably, and I retain a constant sense of texture and atmosphere which does a great job of setting the mood, and foreshadowing of events to come.

Overall, a very engaging piece! There's hardly anything I might suggest in the way of improvement, and usually I'm quite a stickler for perfection! *Bigsmile* Thank you so much for a fabulous read!

All my best and write on!

Wyrd_Naos

*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 02/16/2013 @ 1:17am EST
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