OVERALL SENSE: This is funny! I just can’t imagine you three going up on stage and do a song and dance act. But, then again why not? Who wouldn’t want to kick as high and effortlessly as the Rockettes?

         TITLE APPEAL: “One Too Many—A Tale of an Aging Chick.” Ageless you mean, right?

This story was written for a Blog Contest, Day six.

         STYLE/VOICE: The style is a great sense of humor about yourself.

The voice stays strong as we follow along with your two best friends Joy and Lornda as they help you off the stage to your dressing room.

         TONE/MOOD: The tone is a tongue in cheek story. Pat is trying to be self-assured and reassuring herself that she’ll be ready to go back on stage in a couple of days.

The mood is light-hearted, optimistic, and enlightened. Pat finally realizes that she is unable to go on for a while, so she volunteers Missy to fill in until she can go on stage again.

         SCENE/SETTING: The scene and setting takes place as Joy and Lornda half carry Pat off the stage and towards the dressing room.

         CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT: Pat, Lornda and Joy, The Three Chickadees, are a song and dance team.

Personality: Pat—She is stubborn, determined and doesn’t think she is hurt that bad.

Joy—Tactfully give Pat the bad news that she may be laid up for three weeks.

Lornda—Has plenty of confidence in Pat, knowing she’s a fighter. She also knows enough not to ruffle Pat’s feathers so watches what she says.

Motivation: For Pat to get plenty of rest so she’ll be ready to go back out on the stage. After all, they are The Three Chickadees.

         PLOT: Well thought out with plenty of humorous spots that make you smile. I’m glad I read this story during WDC’s birthday celebration.

Structure: Good job on putting this story together in just a day’s time. I say “Good Job.”

Development: Well developed that the story moves along at a steady pace.

GRAMMAR/SPELLING/SENTENCE STRUCTURE: I didn’t see any mistakes.

AREAS FOR IMPROVEMENT: NONE

         LIKES: I like the spirit in the way this story was written. I mean, if this was true, it had to be devastating when a certain member to a team that knows the routine so well gets injured. Now, what to do? I like how you answered that, put in Missy. I was wondering about her, because I do know she is the fourth chickadee.

         DISLIKES: NONE

FAVORITE LINE(S): I did have some favorite lines that I would like to highlight. I'll explain why I like them and how they added to the story.

          QUOTE HERE: Stage life was a tough life. She would have to build the stamina to work long hours and deal with wise-cracks from leering roosters. Yeah, Pat was right about that one. She had the markings of a winner.

          My Comment: I guess I never really gave it any thought, but I guess there would be those people who like to wise-crack and leer at you while you are trying to earn a living. They are definitely roosters alright!

JUST MY PERSONAL OPINION: This story is so cute and well written. Oh, the problems when you work in a job such as this one. I know I wouldn’t want to do it, but it sure goes well with the name the three of you thought up, “The Three Chickadees” which may make for more interesting and humorous stories to come. Maybe on the four of you next time. Thank you for sharing this item! I only review things that I enjoy reading and I truly did enjoy this piece.



Take care now, keep on writing, I’ll keep on reading,
Jeannie




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .