This review is given on behalf
of
"Showering Acts of Joy Group" 

SAJ

I am reviewing your work as a SAJ member and have had experience reviewing for disABILITY WRITERS GROUP as a group family member, as a PDG member graduate of the Rockin' Review Academy & "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group"  group member.

Your review is in affiliation with:

This review is given on behalf of "Showering Acts of Joy Group" 

SAJ

          WHY I'M REVIEWING FOR YOU
Group/purpose:
This gift is just for you so you can write with might and gift delight to readers through out WDC with confidence and best ability!
Title:
Remains, Silent seemed to me to be a mystery type of title, so I decided to investigate to see if what I suspected was in fact true. My immediate reaction was who and why would someone remain silent? Or why the secrecy? I enjoy mysteries and having these questions gave me good reason to continue my quest for more information.
Description:
Winning Entry for the Oct, 23rd, 2013 DFF: "You have the right to remain silent." is something typical of a police verses bad individual kind of story. The other possibilities would be some held hostage, yet usually information that helps the kidnappers is welcome. Someone held by a person who has motives or desires to inflict pain and torture upon the kidnapped person or some other individual could want the person in their hands to be silent. So with these thoughts, I decided to read your word art and find out what this is all about.
          FIRST IMPRESSIONS
Super great story!
          I LIKE
What and why:
The characters and events are action packed full of emotions, and scenes heart pounding action.

I like action and adventure especially when the story is based on true events. I hope your story is fiction, yet if not this is ok, I understand and am ok with what your word showed me.

The surprise was that her father was in law enforcement or possibly and this is a bit of a stretch, in the military.

I can believe this story because truth has revealed similar situations. When a person is forced to defend themselves or die some how they get extraordinary strength and abilities.
plot:
Your fast moving and exciting plot gave me many ideas which I have shared with you in another section of this review.

The idea that a father could be so hateful and mean to his own daughter is horrible. I know something like this has happened because my friend had an abusive father who was mean and hateful, treating her like slave labor and beating on her.
Rhythm:
For the events ran at a fast pace, like watching a movie with a murder scene that caused the watcher to have to pause or rewind some of the moving pictures so the action can been seen and understood. This isn't bad, just my way of explaining how the story effected me.

I had no trouble understanding what was happening and found that with some creative changes this story could be more exciting and more like watching a movie rather then reading. Reading your word was an easy and smooth experience.
          OBSERVATION(S)
People can be cruel and there are stories to show in humanity towards humans.
          QUESTION(S)
I have entered contests and have had success, yet I would like to learn more about this activity from the view of how to win more often which would indicate to me that my writing skills have improved so that I have more success. Winning is important, however, I am most interested in the art and techniques of writing very, very well. The contest is a guide which will help me to know how well I have written something.

What advice do you have for me? How have you learned about writing and what have you used to gauge your progress? Are there any books you would recommend which would be helpful for me so that I can improve my writing?

I know there are rules and requirements for contest entries. As I read your story I had ideas to ahare with you, so these ideas are based on what I feel and think would help your story. What can be done with them within the guidelines of the contest, I do not know. Also, I know not if you are interested in making any changes, which is ok. I'm sharing information with you.
          SUGGESTIONS AND COMMENTS:
This is something that would work well for a movie idea that could be woven into more scenes and have a lot of action and adventure.
My thoughts and ideas which may be of interest to you:
         
She, weaker than his force in her teenage frame, didn't... My thoughts are that, She, much more weaker, or being weaker because of physical issues, would indicate her physical situation and ability or lack of ability to fight him off successfully. Using the word in for me means inside her. I would consider using upon, or exerted upon her teenage frame, which shows he had a lot of power over her physically and psychologically. I'm thinking from the point of view that the writer should as much as possible show the reader what the scene is about rather than telling the story. This way, the reader is involved in the actions and events as well as knowing a lot about the characters.

In the paragraph about the hit to her jaw with the buckle that left her reeling in pain, I would put a comma at the end of the first sentence and finish the thought.
She lay on the bed reeling in pain from the blow to her jaw. That metallic buckle. Her head felt as if it were swelling, with the pulse of her heartbeat against the inside of her skull.
She lay on the bed reeling in pain from the blow to her jaw,with the metallic buckle, which her father wielded with strength and accuracy. As the pulse of her heartbeat against the inside of her skull pounded Her head she felt as if it were swelling and ready to explode.

Then she felt it. The heartbeat grew softer, became more like a drop of water into a pond. She felt herself separating from the experience of the punishment. The pain faded quickly and was replaced with... power.
}Then she felt her heartbeat grew softer, more like a drop of water into a pond. Separating herself from the experience of the punishment and agonizing pain that faded quickly, she was suddenly aware of unbelievably great and intense power. Or, any other word(s) which would show how she becamne strong and powerful enough to defend herself.

As he readied one last blow, his arm suddenly snapped backwards on its own accord. Screaming to the ground he clutched the shattered bone.
Her father ready to inflict another horrific and shattering blow, his arm was suddenly snapped backward, causing great surprise and excruciating pain. Screaming as he fell to the floor (they are inside not out side) he clutched the shattered bone.

He, fearful, looked up at his daughter.
fearfully and cowering, he looked at his daughter wondering how she got the best of him. Or, Fearing for his life, he looked at his daughter. Or the rage gone, with pain searing through his arm, he looked at his daughter. Or, all of, any of my ideas, which ever fits, you could explain how he felt physically, thought, and wanted to do but was now unable to do to his daughter.

She stood atop her bed. Eyes glowing a fiery hatred of intense energy.
Standing on her bed with eyes glowing a fiery hatred of intense energy, she watched her father.

Sergeant Dooey was found, the next day, crushed under a dresser. His daughter's whereabouts are currently unknown.
The next day, Sergeant Dooey was found, crushed under a dresser. His daughter's whereabouts are currently unknown. Sergeant Dooey was found, crushed under a dresser, the next day,.
CONCLUSION(S)
Sadly someone died, however, it was self defense.
My thoughts and Impressions:
You wrote a marvelous and exciting story that kept me engaged and devouring every word because I wanted to know what was happening next.

Thank you for sharing your writing otherwise what I call word art with me, your story, and allowing me to review for you.

I learned a lot from reading and reviewing your story. There can be with limited words a super interesting and fast action story that keeps the reader proceeding from word to word, sentence to sentence, and scene to scene until they reach the end. I am almost at the end of this review and so I say to you:
write with might for readers delight.
Expanding this story by giving background information, location, and more information about family history would make this short story a novelette. Perhaps it will be published.

Merry Misfits of WDC is an interesting concept. Let me know if you need some help.

Safe travels and many blessings.

This review is given on behalf of "Showering Acts of Joy Group" 

SAJ

Paper Doll Gang review, "Invalid Item" 
especially for you.