Review number # 5 of week July 10-16, 2014

Hi J'nell

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive and 48 Hr. Read A Newbie Mission.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! I have only my humble opinion to offer; please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: The Terrorist Threat Called Cancer

First Impression: My heart goes out to the author I am way to familiar with her battle. Chemo is not easy no matter hard you mentally prepare.

What I liked: How the author stated directly what she did and what to expect. Cancer is very difficult and this poem really encourages the reader to face the battle head on.

What needs your attention: Spelling error chemical- "Shooting Toxic Chemiacals and exposure to burn". This should broke down into two lines to keep your rhyming sequence- "Cancer the terrorist, has no chance, for my inner Cancer assassination rants!"
I believe you were looking for filled up not filed-"Breast tissue filed up and sloshed like a wave."

Favorite Parts: Cancer has struck, the author like me wanted to scream but instead faced the battle with courage and strength through out the ordeal. Congratulations!

Overall Impression: J'nell this poem would be more visually powerful if you centered the poem and placed a space between the title and your name and another space before the first line begins. It is a very good poem and begs to boldly jump off the page to the reader. You have every reason to proudly display this excellent poem.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .