*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4018413
Review #4018413
Viewing a review of:
 
Trusting Love  [E]
A poem of new and different love.
by Lavender
Review of Trusting Love  
Review by Charlie ~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hello, Lavender . My name is Charlie and I'm happy to be reviewing your poem that I found on the "Please Review" page. Please keep in mind that the following is just the opinion of one reader. I am not a professional and you know your work better than anyone else. If you find something helpful here, use it. If you don't, feel free to disregard this completely. *Cool*



*Buttonplay* First Impressions

I like the title and image you chose for this poem. I think we can all relate to the subject matter here. It's hard to open yourself up to love once you've been wronged in a past relationship. It's easy to fall into the negative mindset of assuming that all people are the same. It's even worse when you feel like you end up making bad choices on who to be with. The "damaged guy" that you talk about is someone who is commonly taken in by people that think they can fix him. In the end, we realize that we need to focus on making ourselves happy and finding someone who is ready for that in their life as well.


*Thumbsup* What I liked

I think you did a good job with the emotional side of this poem. It feels genuine and from the heart. The flow is smooth as well, for the most part, with a loose ABCB rhyming pattern. There are four lines per stanza and four stanzas total. My favorite stanza was the first one. I feel like it's the strongest writing with the best flow.


*Skull* What Could Use Work

I'm taking issue with the last stanza in your poem, especially the last two lines. The rest of the poem is a lot stronger than those two lines and it needs to end on a strong note. "Don't let me down, cause I will frown" doesn't really convey the mature emotion behind the poem. I think it needs to be looked at again.


*Peace2* Summary

Overall, I enjoyed reading your poem and getting this glimpse into your state of mind while writing it. I think a lot of people would be able to relate to how you feel here. Thanks again for sharing with us.




** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 07/21/2014 @ 5:29pm EDT
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4018413