Hello Creative!

I found your story on the review a newbie page and I enjoyed reading it.

I am not an English major or an expert in grammar. I am simply offering my humble opinion concerning your work.

I hope you find this feedback useful

Overall Impression:I thought your article was well written. I could sense the frustration in your words over wanting to be accepted but also wanting to be who you are.

Characters:I was happy to see the change in attitude by the end of the article. We live in a world today where people vainly see people by their outer looks rather than their inner beauty. Even Jesus said we need not worry about the outside of the cup being dirty, its the inside that needs to be cleaned.

Plot: There really wasn't a plot to your article but I do think there was a strong statement. Reading this gave me the impression that this was your statement of independence. No longer are you going to live your life to please the world, you were going to live it to be happy within yourself.

Grammar and Mechanics:I saw no errors in your article. I thought it was well written.

Suggestions:I would suggest you believe in yourself, be who you are, and keep writing!!

Thank you for sharing your story.

I welcome you to visit my portfolio and offer a review on any piece that may interest you

Rozebud

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .