*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4021315
Review #4021315
Viewing a review of:
 Grey Wolf and the Jaguar  [18+]
A passionate playground of conflicting needs and desires. Expression of a bi-polar heart
by Shelley Esh
Review by Charlie ~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hello, Shelley Esh . My name is Charlie and I'm happy to be reviewing your poem that I found through the "Random Review" tool. Please keep in mind that the following is just the opinion of one reader. I am not a professional and you know your work better than anyone else. If you find something helpful here, use it. If you don't, feel free to disregard this completely. *Cool*



*Buttonplay* First Impressions

A beautiful expression of mental disorder through the symbolism of a wolf and jaguar. You explore the two sides of bipolar disorder and what each side means to you.


*Thumbsup* What I liked

The imagery in this piece is amazing. I love all the different symbolism you used to represent each side of the disorder. I don't suffer from bipolar disorder, though someone very close to me does, and I think this is a great way to explain it to someone who does not have personal experience with it. I liked the dark nature of the poem and the raw emotion used.

The entire last stanza was my favorite part, but particularly the first two lines, "My love is a disease and I am cured by the dawn."


*Skull* What Could Use Work

There are some things in the poem that aren't in my style or to my personal taste. You use punctuation in your poem, but it isn't consistent throughout. There are areas that need commas or other punctuation where you don't have any. I thought the length of the stanzas was a little off in some places. It seemed like some needed to be split into two stanzas while others could have been combined.


*Peace2* Summary

Overall, I enjoyed reading your poem and thought it was a passionate representation of the disorder you're facing. Thanks for sharing with us!




** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4021315