Welcome To WDC"Newbie Welcome Wagon" 

Hi Chris,
This is a wonderfully entertaining story. The tone is light and conversational. It captures the reader's interest right away. The reader is delighted by this story and gets into it. The plot is straight forward and moves along logically. The conflict is well defined. There is not doubt as to what is going on here. The description is full and vivid. It put the reader all the way into the story. I found one typo:

1)"the internet was plumbed in"-plumbed should be plugged.

Other than this the story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Good job.