Review number 3 # of week Dec.4-10th

Hi Hope,

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: The Flower

First Impression: Interesting view of a flower's life.

What I liked: The clouds disappear and the flower grows more.

What needs your attention: I truly believe you have a great poem but it would be so much stronger in present tense.
Look at the petals
Almost in bloom
The leaves stumble up the vine.
Experiences a gardener loves,
a typical passserby bored
The flower begins to bloom
The water is consumed in the midst of seeds
Daring to bloom before my eyes

Just food for thought, you can take it or leave it.


Favorite Parts: The flower awakes and delights in the sunlight. I am a gardener, it is beautiful to see the petals stretch in the sunshine and watch the flower grow before your eyes.

Overall Impression: Flowers are beautiful and watching them grow is a joy that everyone should experience.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .