I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest" .
Thanks so much for entering!

Some things I Like:

You packed a whole lot of good character details in this piece, and the character's voice is pretty strong (if not super unique).

Observations & Suggestions:

The headers seemed a bit weird for a piece this short. Just my preference, I suppose.

As interesting as the story is at times, I never really felt invested in it. I didn't really care what happened to the narrator and never lost myself in the story. I think it is pretty good for a contest like this one... it is a fair characterization. Somehow, it never quite gelled for me though. I can't quite explain it, to be honest. It had lots of great elements that added up to an 'okay' for me rather than a 'wow'. That's about all I can tell you... wish I could be more helpful here.

As far as the contest goes, I do think that you fulfilled the prompt well! Good luck!



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .