Hello from Bikerider I am pleased to offer this review on your entry "Winter Wonderlands"  as a judge for the "A Romance Contest" . I hope you find my comments useful.


Followed the contests rules and/or prompts given:
Your story follows the prompt and contest rules perfectly. Two lovers, one new to the cold and snow, the other anxious to show the wonders of winter or join his partner in warmer climes. Very well done!


What I liked:

I like that you chose New York City as the location for the story. The crowds, the excitement of the event, the cold. It made the two characters, Robert and James anonymous, even though they were surrounded by so many people. This highlighted the fact that the two men ignored their surroundings because of their affection and attention to each other. They treated each other as if they were alone. You chose a good setting for the story.

I liked the way you showed James's affluence by him suggesting they take his jet to Australia, or to return to his Penthouse. This is a good example of showing instead of telling. Nicely done.


Punctuation/Spelling:

I saw no errors that distracted from the story.

Favorite Lines:

James murmured, pulling Robert close, till they were flush against each other: a crowd of two in a crowd of hundreds.

Lost in each other as they were, neither noticed when the crowd cheers the event they'd all gathered here to see: the lighting of the Christmas Tree. In fact, they didn't notice much of anything until the crowd shifted in preparation for dispersal, becoming all jabbing elbows and careless feet.


Comments/Suggestions:

I have attended the lighting of the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree, so this story brought back the fond memory of that. Having been there, I know how romantic the setting can be, how a person can get lost in the crowd, and the way the crowd has no effect on lovers intent on showing their love.

Two people in love find themselves at a crowded New York venue, but that does not keep from sharing, emotionally and physically, the love they have for each other. This makes the story real, the romance authentic, and the dialogue filled with emotion.




















My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .