Hello valsaven,

I just read your flash fiction "Invalid Item" , which I found when searching for newbies to review and wanted to share my personal thoughts with you.

Disclaimer: Please remember that the following suggestions are based off of my own opinion and personal interpretation of your work. Feel free to take and/or toss out any of my suggestions.



Creepy! For a flash fiction story, you were able to at least surprise me with the ending! Usually flash fiction can be predictable and I think we all knew something was going to happen, just not what. And that was my favorite part!



I don't know what your word limit is but there could really use some expanding in areas. You have a beginning middle and end, but nothing inbetween, it's bare bones. Fill it in. And perhaps add it as a special towel, and give him plenty to choose from. For some reason his curiosity, or an accident made him use the towel and now he;s suffered the consequence. Expand, expand, expand.



You've got a great skeleton of a story here, build upon it and it'll shine!

I enjoyed reading your work and hope my review was helpful and encouraging!

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .