%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4130064 |
 | The Man of her Dreams  [E] A student's romantic plans (written in July 2011)  |
| (4.5)  Welcome to WDC from "Newbie Welcome Wagon" !  Hello,DJF . I found your piece "The man of her dreams" in "Read a newbie". I would like to leave you some comments, which are not professional, just my personal opinion. Feel free to ignore anything you don't find useful. Here is,Review of "The man of her dreams"  Impressions I chose your piece as one to come back to, for when I had more time. The time has come for me to read it and I am so glad I chose it! This little story, written as a diary entry, is so sweet and innocent, and reminds me of a previous time when our minds really worked this way and we had hopes and dreams like this guy did.  CharactersI expected it to be a woman talking. Instead, I got a man, a young student, who is imagining how it would be if his loved one chose him, too. He is being described through her eyes and in his mind, which is kind of brilliant, although it may seem complicated. I liked the fact that he describes all the virtues that he wishes he has (or maybe even has) and he imagines the impact he will have not only on the girl but on her whole family.  Development He takes it step by step. First what she sees, then what she hears, in the end what they will say and do. The description at her house is really enjoyable, the verbal "ping-pong", (I'll say- they'll say" is both interesting and funny as well. NotesThe one thing I have to comment on is that when I read the title I expected to see a piece from the point of view of a woman describing how the man of her dreams would be. The idea of having a man imagining he IS the man of a woman's dreams, I think is much cleverer and out of the box. It made the piece so much different from what I expected, not so much in terms of context, but as a whole concept.  Favorite linesI laughed a lot with the sentence in the first paragraph that describes the logo on the t-shirt. So many things to deduct from such a small word! Pretty funny!Thank you for sharing. Best wishes,   Susan
|
|||
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
You have not yet responded to this review.