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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4131180
Review #4131180
Viewing a review of:
Spoken With Love  [E]
My Heart for you
by ~WhoMe???~
Review of Spoken With Love  
Review by Cubby
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
House Florent Image for G.o.T.
Affiliated with "Blog City ~ Every Blogger's Paradise" 

Greetings from House Florent, "King's Landing updating " !

Hi! My name is Cubby and I will be providing you with feedback today. As part of my raid from Team Florent, I am reviewing "Spoken With Love" 

*Sun* What I really liked about it: Unfortunately, holidays are commercialized, but still... *Heart* And what great gifts! And with the price of flowers, I'd much rather have something I can use! I must ask... Did this really happen to you?

*Clouds* You might want to consider: There are a few lines that don't flow as well as the others... a bit crowded with too many beats. But I also realize you want to tell your story here and perhaps you aren't after perfect meter. *Wink* In the last stanza, first line, I'm wondering if you forgot the word is in this not so grand? Also, the next line down your the best should be you're the best. In the last line, you might want to think about possibly changing into one to together for a smoother read. *Smile*

*Starb* Final thoughts... I really liked this because it isn't a traditional romance poem (I get tired of those at times, lol). I applaud you! A little truth, a nice surprise, and a great ending! Good job!

Have a great day and...
*Tulipp*  K e e p on W r i t i n g ! *Tulipp*

Cubby ")

A "Simply Positive Review Forum "  Review


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