Review of

STATIC

Gift for Natalie  (13+) It's Natalie and Paul's tenth anniversary, so why doesn't she want her gift? #1973640 by Charlie ~

Hello,Charlie ~

I'm Bikerider and I am reviewing your item for "King's Landing updating "  I hope you find my comments helpful.




What I liked most, hands down, is this: Some women, I swear. This is an excellent story, and it deserves the 5 star rating I'm giving it, but those four words had me laughing. And I am rarely able to laugh when I read.

As always, I have my favorite places in the story, here are a couple:

Of course, the, Some women, I swear. Fantastic.

“You mean someone’s getting lucky,” Tyler teased, reaching over her for the box of donuts. You captured the essence of men with this.

was warm for late September. I snaked myself through the fenced in yards of Natalie’s neighborhood while a black fog crept along the ground almost as if it were alive. This is where my eyebrows knitted together. If they're married for 10 years, why is he driving to her neighborhood? I wondered. This is where the idea that something weird was going on. This is a great lead in to the remainder of the story.




None, none at all. I saw no punctuation, spelling, or grammar errors in this story, and I wouldn't change a word of it.



I don't usually read horror stories, but I'm very glad I took the time to read this one. You pulled me into what I thought would be a romantic story, you slowly let me see that things were not at they seemed, and then you dropped the real story right in front of me.

I don't know if you won the horror contest or not, but if it didn't then you got cheated. I don't want to make too much of it, but this is one of the best stories I've read on WDC.

Excellent story, one of the best I've read on WDC. I really, truly enjoyed reading this.

Keep writing.

Bikerider

My review has been entered in Good Deeds Get Cash!

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .