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Review #4143416
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by A Guest Visitor
Review of Reminiscence  
Review by ~ Aqua ~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
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Hi 🦄🏳️‍🌈Sapph ! I am Aqua and the following are only my personal opinions. Ultimately, you and only you can decide what works best for your item.

I chose this poem from your portfolio because the brief description really caught my attention. The beginning gave the reader the idea that the narrator had jumped off a building, probably, to do suicide but instead the narrator recalls the good memories as he realises that he still wants to live despite the pain, the things that made him attempt suicide in the first place.

The line 'time seems to halt' is very powerful in your poem and delivers a wide range of emotions to the reader. I love how you start recalling your memories, from your very first, when you were a toddler and then when you were ten years old playing with your friends and finally in college. A beautiful and touching recall of your happy past. You make the reader go through and enjoy the good memories with you, feeling the joy, the happiness of how far you have come. You make the reader go through such good memories that the reader starts to regret the narrator's decision, hoping that there would be a different outcome than the one presented and I was really glad to read that you were given a second chance. It was a good twist and the reader felt grateful reading your experience about her own life and that one should live it to the fullest.

Wonderful, my favourite stanza was the fifth stanza, loved it. The flow of the poem was good, there was no interruption. The vocabulary that you used in your poem was good, it was simple yet effective and delivered the emotions quite well to the reader. Well done! The only thing I would suggest you is to add perhaps one stanza on which you add your thoughts as to your desire to live and that you weren't done with this world yet, show your determination. Other than that, good job!

Thank you for sharing your work with us!

Write On!
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