An Understandable Mistake [E] An employee must explain to his boss, how it all went wrong. |
This was quite interesting to read. You have taken a conversation between a boss and his employee and somehow made it interesting. I don't think that this was interesting because of the situation that Curdy got himself into either (although that was funny). I do think, however, that what made this interesting is your engaging writing style. You've set the scene perfectly and I could clearly envision your main characters and every move they made. Your characterization is also very strong. You have created relatable and well rounded characters within the span of a few short lines and that was a huge part of the appeal of this piece. And last but not least, my favorite part of the whole thing is the humor. It's not the obvious or in-your-face type of humor, it is the more subtle type. And I really enjoyed that. This is beautifully written too. The only thing that might need a bit of improvement are these two sentences: "you have destroyed that ability, in me, to believe" and: "So I took a chance that there was no gold.” The first one feels a bit too wordy (I'm sorry, I know this might sound ridiculous) but I feel like the more straightforward version: "You have destroyed my ability to believe" might work better. As for the second statement, I just found it a bit confusing. I did not understand what the character was really trying to say. Other than that this is quite funny and very nicely written! Many thanks for sharing this! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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