Hello PureSciFi,

my name is Tiggy and I am reviewing your story as a judge for "What a Character! : Official WDC Contest" . Thanks for entering! Please bear in mind that my comments and suggestions are only my opinion. Other reviewers might see it differently.


This was quite an unusual take on the prompt! It was intriguing to read a perspective on faith and beliefs in this setting. Perhaps it’s because I don’t read much sci-fi that I found it so fascinating, but for me, that was an immediate point for originality.

The main character was engaging and her story held my interest. I understood that she lost her faith because of her mother’s death, for which she blamed herself although it wasn’t her fault. It seemed that at the end though, despite her initial reluctance to report religious stories, she was back to doing just that, and I wasn’t sure what had brought about the change. I’m guessing it was her conversation with one of the protestors, but to me, it wasn’t clear.

There was an interesting fact about the main character that you revealed quite late in the story – the fact that she had a third eye in the back of her head – and I was wondering why you hadn’t mentioned it earlier. Up to that point, I had pictured her as a human but perhaps that was wrong.

At first I wasn’t sure about the structure, the way you broke it up into the separate parts with headings that indicated where her path was taking her, but then I thought it worked for this story to keep the events straight.

I liked that the main character kept talking to herself; it broke up the narrative and was a good way to narrate the tale. It seemed that sometimes she was narrating what was going on to keep a record as well, which was an interesting concept. The conversations she had with others sounded natural and, like her monologues, worked to advance the plot. The descriptions were sufficient to create clear images in the readers’ minds, and at times perhaps a bit much. For example, I wasn’t sure if it was necessary to say that she had to sit down to get dressed or how long it took her, unless it was important to say that she missed an appointment because of it, or something along those lines.

The story had an unfinished feel and ended rather abruptly; the conflict didn’t seem resolved. Now that the contest is over, you might want to look at that and see if there might be a more fitting ending, one that wraps the tale up better. Having said that, I did enjoy the read and I think you have a good start here that would be worth a bit of work to polish it.





My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .