OVERVIEW:
         I thought this was a great piece; perfectly suited for a younger demographic. The language was all simple and straight forward, but not to such an extent where it drew attention to itself. You have all the beginnings of a good "coming of age" tale. As far as story elements I didn't find much to critique here. There's a lot of setup which is to be expected. I liked how you used the teacher and classroom to establish the setting and explain some of the history and geography of the region. It's a natural way of expounding on the lore. I thought the pacing was all well handled.

         I guess the one thing I would've like to have seen was better descriptions of the dragons themselves. We basically get rough heights and skin color. Do they have bony ridges on their faces? Spikes on their tales? Are there significant structural differences between the different types of dragons, or they built similarly but just different colors. Not that it all has to be addressed right of the bat. At least, I'd like a more thorough description of Tak-Riel.

         I wish I had more meaningful to add, but all-in-all it's just a really good start to a story. I'm going to add you to my favorites and keep an eye out for future installments.

PLOT:
         As I stated before, it seems that you're setting up a coming of age tell. You have all the basic ingredients; the young and naive hero with something special about him, the mentors, the love interest. I'm curious to see what the major conflict is, and the antagonist.

CHARACTERS:
Tak-Riel
I like the contrast of the child mentality in this giant powerful dragon body.


SPELLING and GRAMMAR:


SUGGESTIONS AND NIT-PICKING:
He managed to adjust his position enough so that his powerful back legs took the majority of the impact, but not enough to keep him from tumbling forward.
Perhaps this is a better word here.