Hello intuey GoT Survivor! ! How are you doing today? I’m Charlie and I’m reviewing on behalf of "a very Wodehouse challenge" . Part of my challenge involves making a “magazine” featuring manly men items. I’ve selected your story to feature because it’s in the men’s genre. Thanks for sharing with us!

Title/General Thoughts/Subject Matter: I just had to read this one because we all know what happens when something breaks in a manly man's house. Seriously, am I the only dude who calls for repairmen straight away? I don't try to fix anything myself. I guess I'm just a nancy boy. I can relate to this story though because my father is totally this way. Something would break in our house and he would break it further before finally giving in and having it fixed.


What Worked: The imagery was hilarious in this story! Oh man, I laughed so hard at the thought of this man swimming through the basement, spitting water out and still claiming he didn't need a plumber. I also loved when the plumber finally showed up and was greeted with this total mess and an out-of-his-mind husband still acting like he doesn't need help.

My favorite line in the whole story was:
For a second, I could swear I see a white halo of light enveloping the plumber's silhouette.
Ah, that's a good one.


Technical Issues/Suggestions: There were a couple nitpicky things I noticed with grammar. For example:

The funny thing is, I don't believe the scene before me, even phases me. The second comma isn't necessary here.

Pipes at all angles and of all sizes were now joining the fountains of water in their tribal dance. The 'were now joining' part is passive voice instead of active.


Final Thoughts: Overall, I think this is a great piece to feature in my fictional men's magazine that will never be created. Thanks again for sharing and giving me a laugh!


Best wishes,





My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .