*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4236211
Review #4236211
Viewing a review of:
 Secrets Past - chapter 1  [13+]
Light paranormal romance--wip
by Melissa Murphy--Soon Published
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

The beginning is very strong and fast paced! I can feel what's happening, riveted from the beginning! I would very much like to see how this story unfolds. How does William get used to living in the modern world?


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Wow. It's like a reversed Outlander. It's a pretty cool concept. I love the idea of someone from the past coming to present day, why not? Yes, I think enough people would love this idea given that Outlander is so popular right now.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

I think it's going to be a love story. After all she knew his name was William and it's marked as a romance. It almost sets the woman up to be the protector which would be very empowering role for a female character. I like that angle a lot.


*StarStruck* Glows:

The writing is so fast paced, I felt like I was watching a movie! I could almost cast their roles. Your writing is also very descriptive. For example the description of the light was so detailed, I could see it fan out among the trees and grow.



*Vine1* Grows:

I would of made the witch young and beautiful just to put some sensual tension there but it may not be appropriate for the story your building. It was a five! Congratulations on the publishing! Good luck! I know I'd like to keep reading.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4236211