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Review #4240266
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Review by ~ Aqua ~
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Rated: | (4.0)
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*Shield6* A "Game of Thrones *Sun* Martell *Sun* Review *Shield6*

A Review from "SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP


Hello, Rima... ! I am Aqua and the following are only my personal opinions. Ultimately, you and only you can decide what works best for your item.


What an interesting story you have here! You should add "drama" and "relationship" to the two genres where you have 'others'. I was searching for something to review from your portfolio and this one caught my attention. The short description didn't give anything away to the reader and the title simply intrigued her. I wanted to know what kind of a story you had written on salmon and who was saved by the salmon.

The flash fiction is written well and is full of drama and mystery. The flow of your flash fiction was good, there was no interruption. The reader was quite curious in the end and would like to know exactly what happened in the end. She put the ring on the plate so that he would see and they would talk things out right? Or was it meant as a sign that things between the two of them were over?

I really liked how you mentioned the key to a man's heart is his stomach! I read it in a story and thought it was just something made up but since you used it here too, I guess it really is a famous tip and real too! I had a few suggestions for your work. Feel free to ignore any if you don't agree.

==>Her husband, Alex, had been keeping distances from her.
Her husband, Alex, had been keeping distance from her.

==>He never properly answered to her questions and if he ever did they were so absurd that Jennifer didn’t know what to make of it.
He never properly answered her questions and if he ever did they were so absurd (how about choosing the word 'vague' ?) that Jennifer didn’t know what to make of it.

==>May be she could fix his favourite dish and talk this through.
Maybe she could fix his favourite dish and talk this through.

==>Trains of thought ran through her
Train of thoughts ran through her

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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 07/19/2016 @ 1:16pm EDT
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