Hi gardengirl,

A "Game of Thrones"  House Martell Review!

Form and image:

Your poem conforms to the requirements of the form, and is octosyllabic. I'll be honest, I can't tell if this written in strict tetrameter or not. On my first read-through it didn't sound to be in meter, then on the next read it sounded in tetrameter. Now I'm just very confused

The two quatrains follow the BBCC rhyme pattern used in the French version, and your two tercets follow the traditional AXA rhyme pattern.

I like how you have presented your saraband as the tercet-quatrain-tercet-quatrain, as opposed to a single 14 line poem. This not only helps to highlight the individual components of the poem, but also reflects the origins of the poem in the 3-4 saraband dance.

The image you have used is a lovely picture that reflects the words and the spirit of your poem - the butterfly is a symbol of the resurrection of Jesus. It serves as a reminder of what your narrator hopes for.

General impressions:

Your poem has a smooth flow to it. I particular like the use of assonance at the end of the first stanza in the words "heal each tear", and alliteration at the start of the third stanza in the words "Pure love will peak".

Your poem opens with your narrator's past, casting doubts on whether Jesus is there for her, and progresses to talking about finding Jesus and what his love means for her.

The closing line is what all of us seek. We all want to find that peace and tranquillity in our beliefs, whatever they may be.

Closing remarks:

I've really enjoyed reading your poetry. It's just a shame that GoT doesn't allow for me to spend the time reviewing more of your poems. I'll be back at some point to review some more.

Thank you for sharing your work with us! Write On!


Lord Andy~Sunspear of Martell




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .