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Review #4247170
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Review by ~ Aqua ~
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
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*Shield6* A "Game of Thrones"  *Sun* Martell *Sun* Review *Shield6*
A Review from "SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP" 


Hello, OOT™ ! I am Aqua and the following are only my personal opinions. Ultimately, you and only you can decide what works best for your item.


Well, well, I can never get enough of your stories and poems! It has officially been declared, I think I am your secret admirer and lover! *Rolling* Seriously, girl, you have so many awesome things in your portfolio and I miss you! I hope you come back soon! I chose to read this story because of the intriguing title. I have read so many stories and poems based on the sentence, the same concept, but each one was different in its own way and was fascinating. Most of those stories were horror. Reading your title, the reader got the impression that perhaps it were, too, a horror story so to find out, here I am!

The beginning of your work was very good and it reminded me of a story I read in your portfolio about "Let her Eat the Cake" and made me laugh. I got an idea about what the story would be about after the first paragraph and it was exactly that. It really is true, be careful what you wish for! *Laugh* Who knows what we say might actually come true even though we didn't mean it? The flow of your story was good and the idea of a female gaining weight quickly and then dieting was very good and appealing because it's realistic. The character you had here was believable and seemed like a friend to the reader. The setting and the plot was good but it made me wonder, isn't she married or have children? Other than that, there was nothing that seemed off to me. Well done! I found no errors in your work.


*Shield1* Thank you for sharing your work with us! *Shield2*
Write On!
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4247170