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Review #4252400
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by A Guest Visitor
Review of World Upside Down  
Review by Tiggy
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)


Hello Lexi,

my name is Tiggy and I am reviewing your story as a judge for "Short Shots: Official WDC Contest. Thanks for entering! Please bear in mind that my comments and suggestions are only my opinion. Other reviewers might see it differently.


The heart of this cave was a good interpretation of the image prompt. The story leading up to it was the build-up to the main character finding the cave, and although I would have liked him taking a few more moments to look around so that you could show the readers more details, it was easy to see how the picture inspired the story. The characters were fascinating, especially the way you tricked the readers into believing that the main character was kind and caring, knowing that something was bothering his wife but giving her time to work through it. His wife was a little more vague, and at the end, the readers found out why. For such a short story, they both had enough depth to keep the readers engaged in what was happening to them.

The real conflict for the protagonist happened right at the end, but you did a good job getting him there with an interesting plot. On the first read, I missed a subtle hint – in fact I was wondering why you mentioned her best friend by name right at the beginning since she didn’t have anything to do with the rest of the story. When it all came together, I thought that was nicely done. The second hint wasn’t so subtle, and as soon as I read, you have to cut it loose, I had a fairly good idea what was going to happen although I didn’t know why, and I expected it to involve literally cutting the rope. The dialogue sounded natural and you worked the actions at the time around it very well, making it easy for the readers to imagine how the conversation took place.

The descriptions gave a good sense of the setting; there were enough details to picture it clearly and I liked how you mentioned some of the important things, like the rope, almost in passing as part of the descriptions of the equipment, how they were advancing and so on. You stayed in the main character’s head and told the story from his point of view, and it was very polished – I didn’t notice any errors. Overall, a very good read, and I liked the twist at the end!



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