Hello, BlueMoon

There are a lot of interesting things going on in your story, and Riley is quite a sympathetic character.

Personally, I cannot imagine waiting outside a door fifteen minutes to see if it would be opened or not, lol.

The ending was a tad abrupt and unsatisfactory. It seemed to lack any form of resolution. I'd like to know where this search led. Or, is this only the first part of a longer story?

A few notes:

The only inclination was in the letter she mysteriously received -> Did you mean 'indication'?

Not seeing who let in, -> missing word, who let her in

I suspect it may just be the two of us my dear -> comma before person addressed, ie. …the two of us, my dear.

Thank you for sharing!

Best wishes,

Bob :D





My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .