I noticed that you have an anniversary with WDC this month. Happy anniversary and thank you for your contributions that are part of what makes this a wonderful place.

This poem makes a powerful point about moving forward by overcoming fears. With some corrections, I think this would be a great poem.

Sometimes when I write a poem, I step away from it for a day or two and then come back to it and read it out loud. If you would have done that, it is likely that you would have spotted errors easily.

It looks like In stanza three line three and stanza four line five, you meant to write "There's a choice to be made". The way those lines are currently written makes no sense.

In stanza two lines two and three, there are some structural errors. "Fears says" should be either "fears say" or "fear says". "wants says" should be either "wants say" or "want says".

In the first stanza, there should be a period at the end of the stanza with "wants". In stanza two there should be a period after "avoid". In the last stanza, there should be a period after remain.

Thank you for sharing your writing. Remember, this is the opinion of one person. It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.














My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .