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Review #4265928
Viewing a review of:
Sprocket  [E]
A steampunk tinker helps her employer win the big race--300 words
by Schnujo is Late to Lannister
Review of Sprocket  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
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"SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP
Hello there, Schnujo is Late to Lannister
This is a Simply Positive Review. *Hotair*


*Tophat* I loved this! I remember you messaging me and telling me you were entering a flash fiction contest and the prompt was Steampunk. I found this item in your port and figured it may be the one we were talking about.


*UmbrellaY* You had a couple loveable characters, the smart and meticulous personal assistant, who was also employed as a steampunk tinker for her boss, to help him win the big race, and the forgetful genius boss, who needed his tinker more as a daily assistant to keep him on track. She kept the sprockets tuned for his airship, or so it would seem . *Wink*


Observations

"but in time she came to understand that it was the price of his genius[,] and that, she admired more than anything."
Needed a comma before "and" because it separates the next clause from running into it. (genius and that) Thus: "genius, and that, she admired." I think I know this because I have been imprisoned with the comma queen, Winnie Kay in the "Lucky Bones Game." *Laugh*


*BowGr* Anyway, this was not bad for a Steampunk quickie, with some prompt words needing to be woven in, also. You made them fit nicely!


Well done!
*Hotair2*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*



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