Never completed--just a thought what if you took off the 'ed'? Just seems to maybe fit better.

When I think of discordance, I think music, but so far you've just mentioned drumming.

liquefaction -if I had a dictionary with me, I'd look that up. I've never heard of it before.

thirsty dead? if someone or something is dead, they won't be thirsty.

The third verse -eagle tied with chains I didn't get but the rest was great.

red organ sounded like a heart, but I'm not sure.

I'm not sure if I got the poem, but it was very interesting.
Thanks for sharing
love, LinnAnn