Hello, Prosperous Snow celebrating

What I liked

Your story certainly uses the prompt words and possesses clarity. I love the poetry within your prose, with magical lines and phrases like "Moonbeams, like rainbow angels, dance across the ice."

What might need work

A few possible tweaks:

I contemplate going back into the warm cabin for a hot cup of coffee. I dismiss the temptation, knowing that once inside the cabin I won't - this repeats "cabin" unnecessarily, but if you said "knowing that once warm I won't" you'd have tighter and clearer meaning.

looks like I door opening - did you mean "one door" or "a door" here?

onto the road leading to freedom. - tighter

Somewhere to the right I hear the crunch of snow under the paws of a forest predator. - beware filtering. You use a lot of sentences beginning "I" + verb, like "I hear" here. Consider, for example, "Somewhere to the right, snow crunches under the paws of a forest predator." - can you see how this is tighter and avoids filtering?

Also, watch out for too many "as" constructions.

Beside me a four legged hunter - four-legged should be hyphenated

Hope this helps. Thank you for sharing!

Best wishes,

Bob



My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .