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A review by iguanamountain in affiliation with OCEAN


When A Buffalo Falls
by KZN

Chapter 13


Here we are with more excitement for Hunter and Katie.

... A reflect of the sun...
A reflection of the sun...

... ...and leaped into the air taking Katie with him.
Yes, and where did they land that would be out of sight of the shooter?
That's an important bit of information. Behind a big rock, under an overhang? I imagined they were on the far side of the dry creekbed in order to see the man on the ridge. (?)

... I went straight into the wall, face first.
A wall is man-made, so it should be cliff, or rocks.

... of her amusable little habit,
...of her amusing little habit,

... ...far wall again. The sun...
Extra space before 'The'.

... Above all things sacerate to him,...
I think this is what you mean:
Above all things 'sacred' to him,...

... ...in a neat pile on the floor beside...
Floors are man-made, use ground or stone.

... “Be careful, my big Brother,” she whispered in a soft warm voice and picking up the Henry she drew it close to her heart.
Nice ending for this chapter. She's loving, but the gun is held tight.

FINAL COMMENT:
Good chapter with high tension and action. Good contrast between Katie and Hunter. Dialogue is well done. Even though she's injured, Katie shows a lot of control and spirit. Hunter's concern for her is expressed with feeling.
Now I'm wondering who's shooting at them, the plot gets exciting!
You are moving forward, Mervyn.
Best, Gale
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