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Pic—well, that's not a house. Couldn't find a house on fire?
Side note: when I first looked, I thought the lights in the trees were sparks. Made for an even more exciting picture, lemme tellya.

It's Brock and Andrea time! I love Brock and Andrea times. Let's do this!


“Something funny about the paper?” he asked at her second giggle.
         Ahh, gotta love parental questions like this. We know the giggling is not at the paper, but we ask the question this way, anyway. It's always nice to relate to Brock.

Brock would’ve really liked to ask who was that friend,
         Word order: who that friend was,
         I dunno, man, when my son giggles loudly and repetitively at something on the computer, while completely aware that I'm right there in the same room with him, I figure that gives me the opening to ask what's so funny.
         But I do like the chance this gives you to mention the respect he has for her privacy.

hurrying to turn the TV on.
         Bear with me, 'cause this is nitpicky. (I think.) This word order will always make me think, “sexually arousing someone.” Or, in this case, “something.” You turn your lover on. Your lover turns you on. But you turn on a TV.
{indent]I know! My dirty mind again! But, in defense of my dirty mind, moving the word “on” also keep s you from ending the sentence with a preposition.

“Is there any channel to watch news from Boston?”
         Just a tad off. What about: “Is there a channel for news from Boston?”
         Or even more like what someone would say: “Do you have any Boston news channels?”
          “get” would work in place of “have”

It took Brock five whole seconds to process she talked about Gillian.
         Missing a word: process that she
         Though that's still a little awkward. Just a little, mind you. I think maybe just replacing “talked about” with “meant” would fix it. Because it's not really that she “talked about” her—she mentioned her. But he's also specifically meaning that Andrew meant “Gillian” when she said “Connor's mom,” so “meant” just really fits.

Which meant Andrea’s friend on the chat—making her giggle like that—was Gillian’s son.
          Just the wording shows his scowl! I love it so much!

Then the images on screen caught his attention
         Either: onscreen
         Or: on the screen
         Dude, you know one of my favorite little things is when Brock gets to see something pertaining to Gillian on TV. Hee hee hee. It's such good stuff.

Brock didn’t mind it was almost ten and called Russell,
         I'm not sure what you mean by “didn't mind” so I'm not sure what to suggest, but I do know what you have doesn't quite work. (Mainly because I don't' know what you mean. ) Maybe he “ignored” it? Like: Brock ignored that it was almost ten and
         Eh, I'll wait to hear back from you before I do any more guessing.

who gave him a full brief in under a minute:
         It's a briefing, and by its nature it's assumed that it'd be a “full” briefing—though that sounds like an oxymoron, and that plus the context implies it'd be very short. “under a minute” is something I feel like you use a lot? So I really don't think it'd hurt to take it out here and there. And since you don't need it here... You know?
         I'm saying, what about: who gave him a briefing:

paying attention to the background noise at the other end of the line.
         That “at” should be “on”

poking his chest with a menacing scowl.
         Heh, sounds like his scowl is poking Ron's? chest. Like he's physically poking his face into Ron's? chest. So I'd suggest a rewording, but also, we're in Brock's living room watching this, so it just seems all kinds of wrong to use the word “scowl” for somebody else. Makes a character trait start to look like repetitious word usage.
         Wait, Gillian wouldn't have to signal Fred to take Ron away—so is it Hank? Hmm. I like wondering, though, for now.
         Anyway, maybe just: off, poking his chest.
         Or, just as a stab at an alternative: off, with a poke to his chest and a sneer.
         (I dunno—I just feel like sneering goes better with physical aggression than a scowl does, anyway.)

Brock breathed deep not to speak up his mind.
         Wording problem. How about: Brock breathed deep to keep from speaking his mind.

Yet they didn’t. Rather the other way around.
         Gosh, Brock, it's like she knew what she was doing or something! *biggrin* I do admit to enjoying how long it takes this to sink in for him. I mean, yeah, she is a little reckless at times, but most of her seeming-recklessness is actually not so reckless as it looks. I know you know this; I'm just saying it's apparent to me, too.

to walk away, only then she joined her team.
         To match the rest of the structure: away, only then joining her team.

“Connor is helping T and Kurt to go through the phone records
         Let that “to” die. No one wants it here.

Yeah, so damn cool.
         Yes, it is! And I love Andrea for seeing the coolness in all of it—and thinking Gillian's awesome, of course. Ohhh, but I know these last couple of lines perfectly show Brock's opinion right now. And it's just entertaining, especially with a foil like Andrea thinking it's all awesome and cool. Good stuff!


I think it's just fun that you introduce the next bit of action (this fire) like this—through Andrea and Brock. This way, you get to pile in so much stuff! Not only are you introducing the next curve, but we get to know that Andrea and Connor talk so jovially online, and we get all these peeks into Brock's head. It's just such a great approach. Love this chapter.

And it comes right after her talk with Russ in her kitchen, so the image of her getting the call for this fire flashes through my mind when Russell says he was at her house when she got the call. Love that! Like, I wish I could write paragraphs about how much I live for that kind of thing while reading, but I'd just go round and round and probably be completely incoherent. Just know—I love that!

All right, time for a snack and a coat of paint. Then I'll be onto the next chapter.

Chy

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My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .